Comments on: Very bad ways to wake up http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html Brain candy for Happy Mutants Fri, 24 May 2013 16:15:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.4.1 By: brucearthurs http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1675183 brucearthurs Sat, 09 Mar 2013 21:51:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1675183 I remember one time as a kid when my family was camping.  The big tent only held four people, so a couple of my brothers slept in smaller pup tents.  Dave was one of them, and he slept with the end of the pup tent open, his head visible. As it happened, Dave was really phobic about spiders.  As it also happened, the campground had a whole lot of Daddy-Long-Legs spiders around.  One morning, when all us brothers except Dave were awake, we put two and two together, gathered up a bunch of the Daddy-Long-Legs, and dropped them onto Dave's face. It was hilarious.  Being chased around the campground by a screaming brother with a Boy Scout hatchet in his hand, not so much. I remember one time as a kid when my family was camping.  The big tent only held four people, so a couple of my brothers slept in smaller pup tents.  Dave was one of them, and he slept with the end of the pup tent open, his head visible.

As it happened, Dave was really phobic about spiders.  As it also happened, the campground had a whole lot of Daddy-Long-Legs spiders around.  One morning, when all us brothers except Dave were awake, we put two and two together, gathered up a bunch of the Daddy-Long-Legs, and dropped them onto Dave’s face.

It was hilarious.  Being chased around the campground by a screaming brother with a Boy Scout hatchet in his hand, not so much.

]]> By: Jane E. Hawkins http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674792 Jane E. Hawkins Sat, 09 Mar 2013 10:05:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674792  I laughed, but if someone pulled even the mildest of those stunts on me I might wind up in jail for murder.   I laughed, but if someone pulled even the mildest of those stunts on me I might wind up in jail for murder. 

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674639 Preston Sturges Sat, 09 Mar 2013 03:48:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674639 My dad woke me one time by bonking me on the head with a big novelty inflatable bottle of Seagrams, not realizing that the weight in the bottom of the bottle was a disk of pasteboard that hit me in the forehead. You know, stuff like that gives you permission to make your own mistakes as a parent. My dad woke me one time by bonking me on the head with a big novelty inflatable bottle of Seagrams, not realizing that the weight in the bottom of the bottle was a disk of pasteboard that hit me in the forehead.

You know, stuff like that gives you permission to make your own mistakes as a parent.

]]> By: bardfinn http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674587 bardfinn Sat, 09 Mar 2013 01:37:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674587 Nosir, you've spent /just enough/. Nosir, you’ve spent /just enough/.

]]> By: gijoel http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674577 gijoel Sat, 09 Mar 2013 01:25:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674577  Wham's "Wake me up, before you go."  Wham’s “Wake me up, before you go.”

]]> By: Forkboy http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674568 Forkboy Sat, 09 Mar 2013 01:16:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674568  Yeah it's a pretty famous prank from the Prankvsprank Youtube channel (AKA "the crasiest couple on the internet")  Yeah it’s a pretty famous prank from the Prankvsprank Youtube channel (AKA “the crasiest couple on the internet”)

]]> By: Andy Murdock http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674520 Andy Murdock Fri, 08 Mar 2013 23:55:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674520 If you kill one of these pranksters in the first 15 seconds after waking up, you would be able to claim self defense and not be charged. Some of these psychotic morons don't deserve a beating heart. If you kill one of these pranksters in the first 15 seconds after waking up, you would be able to claim self defense and not be charged. Some of these psychotic morons don’t deserve a beating heart.

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674479 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 23:21:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674479  "I went home with you?"  ”I went home with you?”

]]> By: brucearthurs http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674470 brucearthurs Fri, 08 Mar 2013 23:05:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674470 Once when my wife and I were getting into bed, she spied a large spider crawling across the ceiling.  Being the gallant type, I stood up on the bed and started chasing the spider, trying to swat it and missing repeatedly.  I was interrupted in my efforts by the sudden BONKETABONKETABONKETA across the back of my head.  Only temporarily painful, I can report.  I don't remember if I ever managed to smack the spider. (My wife didn't laugh.  Damn good wife, she is.) Once when my wife and I were getting into bed, she spied a large spider crawling across the ceiling.  Being the gallant type, I stood up on the bed and started chasing the spider, trying to swat it and missing repeatedly.  I was interrupted in my efforts by the sudden BONKETABONKETABONKETA across the back of my head.  Only temporarily painful, I can report.  I don’t remember if I ever managed to smack the spider.

(My wife didn’t laugh.  Damn good wife, she is.)

]]> By: mrgoldenbrown http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674386 mrgoldenbrown Fri, 08 Mar 2013 22:01:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674386 Today I learned I'm inhuman for having too much empathy to laugh at pointless cruelty. Today I learned I’m inhuman for having too much empathy to laugh at pointless cruelty.

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674329 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:56:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674329 I think that was a mannequin head I think that was a mannequin head

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674327 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:54:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674327 When we were kids we didn't have any of your fancy video games. For entertainment, we took turns hitting each other in the head with a hammer.And if you were good, maybe you got a new hammer for Christmas. And we LIKED it. When we were kids we didn’t have any of your fancy video games. For entertainment, we took turns hitting each other in the head with a hammer.And if you were good, maybe you got a new hammer for Christmas. And we LIKED it.

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674323 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:50:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674323 I many shamanistic cultures it is taboo to awaken someone because the soul roams the earth when the sleeper dreams, and awakening the sleeper could leave them without their soul and insane. Likewise it can be forbidden to put a hat on a sleeping person or otherwise disguise them so the soul can't recognize their home.  Presumably this includes using felt tip markers to draw dicks on someone's face.  I many shamanistic cultures it is taboo to awaken someone because the soul roams the earth when the sleeper dreams, and awakening the sleeper could leave them without their soul and insane. Likewise it can be forbidden to put a hat on a sleeping person or otherwise disguise them so the soul can’t recognize their home.  Presumably this includes using felt tip markers to draw dicks on someone’s face. 

]]> By: blueelm http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674324 blueelm Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:50:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674324 Yeah. Right up there with waking up with a plastic bag on your head. Cuz nothings funnier than thinking you're about to get raped! Yeah. Right up there with waking up with a plastic bag on your head. Cuz nothings funnier than thinking you’re about to get raped!

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674322 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:46:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674322 What was the line from the Venture Brothers?   "If that happened to me I would run right at the first living thing I saw and kill it."  Update - that was ATHF, Master Shake of course http://www.hark.com/clips/chlxgylfdd-kill-it What was the line from the Venture Brothers?  

“If that happened to me I would run right at the first living thing I saw and kill it.” 

Update – that was ATHF, Master Shake of course

http://www.hark.com/clips/chlxgylfdd-kill-it

]]> By: Preston Sturges http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674321 Preston Sturges Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:43:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674321 A friend used to fall asleep at the wheel and one night he nodded off on winding road, then awoke with a thump but he was on the road and drove home no trouble.  The next day he went back to the S curve and could see tire tracks where he had gone through the front yard of a house, just missed the house,  passed through a 5' gap between a couple trees, sailed off an embankment and landed back in his lane. A friend used to fall asleep at the wheel and one night he nodded off on winding road, then awoke with a thump but he was on the road and drove home no trouble.  The next day he went back to the S curve and could see tire tracks where he had gone through the front yard of a house, just missed the house,  passed through a 5′ gap between a couple trees, sailed off an embankment and landed back in his lane.

]]> By: invictus http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674301 invictus Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:13:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674301 The TV and closet prank has been one of my favourites for a long time. Not only is it almost entirely harmless, it's also largely truthful. The perpetrator yells "get up, we're being flooded! Grab the TV, save the teddy bear, leave me, and run for the closet!" The banana, well... I got nuth'n, but given where we're having this conversation... Just look at it. The TV and closet prank has been one of my favourites for a long time. Not only is it almost entirely harmless, it’s also largely truthful. The perpetrator yells “get up, we’re being flooded! Grab the TV, save the teddy bear, leave me, and run for the closet!”

The banana, well… I got nuth’n, but given where we’re having this conversation…

Just look at it.

]]> By: Nagurski http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674299 Nagurski Fri, 08 Mar 2013 20:11:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674299  Mythbusters explores this possibility in excruciating detail: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wVVkCJpY4U  Mythbusters explores this possibility in excruciating detail:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wVVkCJpY4U

]]> By: Fangaffes http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674222 Fangaffes Fri, 08 Mar 2013 19:15:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674222 If any of those happened to me, the perpetrator would not wake up.  Christ, what a bunch of assholes! If any of those happened to me, the perpetrator would not wake up.  Christ, what a bunch of assholes!

]]> By: Gyrofrog http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674204 Gyrofrog Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:45:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674204 Careful there, that cuts both ways: remember what happened to ACORN? EDIT: Sonofagun, he's <a href="http://www.forbes.com/sites/rickungar/2013/03/08/james-okeefe-pays-100000-to-acorn-employee-he-smeared-conservative-media-yawns/" rel="nofollow">in the news...</a> Careful there, that cuts both ways: remember what happened to ACORN?

EDIT: Sonofagun, he’s in the news…

]]> By: Gyrofrog http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674203 Gyrofrog Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:43:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674203 That was my assumption.  Not that this is a healthy way to go about resolving problems, but presumably some of these antics lack context. That was my assumption.  Not that this is a healthy way to go about resolving problems, but presumably some of these antics lack context.

]]> By: ldobe http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674195 ldobe Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:40:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674195 I've perpetrated a number of them.  The table's my favorite, I wish I'd been that creative.  I let sleeping dogs lie now. I’ve perpetrated a number of them.  The table’s my favorite, I wish I’d been that creative.  I let sleeping dogs lie now.

]]> By: Gyrofrog http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674191 Gyrofrog Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:35:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674191 "I hope the idiots that make them got it back twice as hard."  Maybe that's what (some of) these videos are? “I hope the idiots that make them got it back twice as hard.”  Maybe that’s what (some of) these videos are?

]]> By: UncaScrooge http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674182 UncaScrooge Fri, 08 Mar 2013 18:26:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674182 The world needs assholes, but their endless drive needs to be channeled into something productive. Otherwise you end up with a mildly amusing catalog of Crimes Against Sleep. Just think if these kids were in charge of the theatrical end of labor demonstrations. We'd all be working a three day week by now. The world needs assholes, but their endless drive needs to be channeled into something productive. Otherwise you end up with a mildly amusing catalog of Crimes Against Sleep. Just think if these kids were in charge of the theatrical end of labor demonstrations. We’d all be working a three day week by now.

]]> By: MossWatson http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674136 MossWatson Fri, 08 Mar 2013 17:35:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674136 The only reason I even finished watching this video was because I was hoping that at least one "prankster" would have ended up getting punched in the face.  The only reason I even finished watching this video was because I was hoping that at least one “prankster” would have ended up getting punched in the face. 

]]> By: strangefriend http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674137 strangefriend Fri, 08 Mar 2013 17:35:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674137   . . . none of those waked up didn't immediately come up with a 9MM & pumped seven bullets at anyone moving.  I'm surprised.   . . . none of those waked up didn’t immediately come up with a 9MM & pumped seven bullets at anyone moving.  I’m surprised.

]]> By: howaboutthisdangit http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674107 howaboutthisdangit Fri, 08 Mar 2013 17:00:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674107 As I watched that part, the words "Just look at it!" ran through my mind.  I spend too much time reading BB. As I watched that part, the words “Just look at it!” ran through my mind.  I spend too much time reading BB.

]]> By: LinkMan http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674092 LinkMan Fri, 08 Mar 2013 16:45:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674092  I feel less guilty about the watching and more guilty about how hard I laughed at some of the dumbest ones...  I feel less guilty about the watching and more guilty about how hard I laughed at some of the dumbest ones…

]]> By: Juan Carlos Diaz http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674077 Juan Carlos Diaz Fri, 08 Mar 2013 16:17:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674077 the russian guy with the banana tv and teddy bear is fucking amazing. Fuck you, im keeping the teddy.  the russian guy with the banana tv and teddy bear is fucking amazing. Fuck you, im keeping the teddy. 

]]> By: Jerril http://boingboing.net/2013/03/07/very-bad-ways-to-wake-up.html#comment-1674076 Jerril Fri, 08 Mar 2013 16:11:00 +0000 http://boingboing.net/?p=217349#comment-1674076  My vindictive ape doesn't know any of these victims, why the hell would it be gleeful?  My vindictive ape doesn’t know any of these victims, why the hell would it be gleeful?

]]>