HOWTO make homemade "Cadbury's Easter creme" eggs

Ashley Rodriguez has tweaked a recipe for homemade "Cadbury's" Easter creme eggs from Instructables user Scoochmaroo and published it. The store-bought version of these glop-filled chocolate eggs always seem like a good idea until they get halfway down my oesophagus (whereupon they try to reverse direction); who knows, maybe a "small batch" homemade one with less HFCS and plutonium* will continue to reward ingestion all the way to my digestive tract's terminus.

½ cup Lyle’s golden syrup
6 tablespoons butter, softened
½ teaspoon salt
3 drops orange blossom water (optional)
1 vanilla bean, seeds removed (optional)
1 teaspoon vanilla
3 cup powdered sugar
¼ to ½ teaspoon yellow food coloring
12 ounces dark chocolate, chopped (or 1 bag bittersweet chocolate chips)

Homemade Cadbury Creme Eggs (via Lifehacker)

*Or whatever Cadbury's uses to attain that "Holy shitting Cthulhu, what have I just swallowed?" sensation

I write books. My latest is a YA science fiction novel called Homeland (it's the sequel to Little Brother). More books: Rapture of the Nerds (a novel, with Charlie Stross); With a Little Help (short stories); and The Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow (novella and nonfic). I speak all over the place and I tweet and tumble, too.

MORE: carbs • Food • makers • not food • recipes

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bzishi

Oh, great! Now the health freaks are complaining about the added plutonium in our children’s candy? When will it end?

Btw, it looks delicious, even without plutonium.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Freethinkersanon Christopher

The cutaway looks less like a creme egg and more like a Scotch egg. I have tried making Scotch eggs at home, and, while successful, found it to be way too much work.
- RadioSilence
  
  I get them from the butcher, they’re much better than the supermarket ones.
  Have you heard of Manchester Eggs? They’re the same as a Scotch Egg but with black pudding in place of the sausagemeat. I’ve never seen them but they sound delicious!
- Antinous / Moderator
  
  Scotch eggs make me want to send money overseas so that children don’t have to eat that sort of thing.
  - kraut
    
    Bah humbug! Good scotch eggs are wonderful. Bad scotch eggs are, admittedly, moderately disgusting, but no more so than most British ready-made supermarket fare,
SumAnon

Drool-worthy
welcomeabored

I can only assume ‘Donald Petersen’ would approve of this recipe, although he has still managed to choke down the ‘pustulent’ Cadbury version (or so he says).

I have to avert my eyes from the plates of those who like their eggs sunnyside up. Blech!
- Donald Petersen
  
  Looks too labor-intensive, though the ingredients list seems yummy enough. If somebody went through the trouble to make one, I’d choke it down, pus and all. Couldn’t really be any worse than the Cadbury one, could it?
  
  Oh, and by the way, shitting Cthulhu is, by its very nature, most UNholy.
  - Frank Lee Scarlett
    
    Looks like the Platonic filling of an Oreo (powdered sugar and shortening, flavored with lovely natural essences), covered in chocolate. So a frosting egg covered in chocolate? Sure. Once a year. And it’s pretty.
jessicac

Wow. some people prefer not to ingest Plutonium and suddenly they’re labeled health freaks. Look up what it can do to your body/health and you may just change your mind… Unless you don’t care about your health, in which case, you can go enjoy your Plutonium eggs ;)
- teapot
  
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RadioSilence

Any Brits looking for a deal on Cadbury’s Creme Eggs, Home Bargains is selling 8 for a pound. I doubt you’ll find them cheaper than that.
- http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby
  
  Brit checking in here. What the hell is ‘Home Bargains’??
  - TrevorSweet
    
    Somewhere you ought to visit:
    
    http://www.hotukdeals.com/deals/homebargains.co.uk
    - http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby
      
      Ah, nearest one is 70 miles away, explains why I haven’t come across it!
      There’s one in my hometown though – ill put in a request for my soon to be visiting parents. £100 worth should do it.
- Stooge
  
  Does that include a lifetime supply of insulin?
http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby

The ratios are all wrong, that up there looks like it’d just taste of liquid sugar.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e4/Cadbury-Creme-Egg-Whole-%26-Split.jpg/800px-Cadbury-Creme-Egg-Whole-%26-Split.jpg

Also you can drop the ‘Easter’, it’s just a Creme Egg.
- kraut
  
  They’re technically easter eggs. They appear in shops a few months before easter, and linger in petrol stations for a few months afterwards.
  - http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby
    
    Lies. You can buy them all year round. They just up the marketing at Easter 1000%.
    - http://twitter.com/bazilisk Sylvia
      
      Maybe in the UK they are there year-round. Not so in the states. I was an expert in these things as a sugar-addicted child.
      - http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby
        
        Actually Wikipedia states:
        
        “Creme eggs are available annually between January 1 and Easter Day.[4][5] In the 1980s Cadbury made Creme Eggs available year-round but sales dropped and they returned to seasonal availability.[6]”
        
        So maybe I’m wrong. My guess would be that most places I’d pick them up would stock them all year round whether Cadbury wanted them to or not. It’s not like a dense sugar ball is going to go out of date over a period of weeks.
        
        So officially they are an Easter (well, Q1 to be precise) product. But more importantly the word ‘Easter’ is in no way attached to the product. In fact they call it ‘Creme Egg Season’ on the Cadbury’s website :)
Purplecat

You could do that. Or you could do it the awesome way.
timquinn

Cory, I think the trouble you are having could be traced to, well, you are supposed to chew it up before attempting to swallow. Let me know if that works out for you.
teapot

Obligatory:
http://xkcd.com/1035/