Iranian scientist invents machine that predicts the future

Telegraph: “I have been working on this project for the last 10 years,” said Mr. Razeghi. “My invention easily fits into the size of a personal computer case and can predict details of the next 5-8 years of the life of its users. It will not take you into the future, it will bring the future to you.” (Thanks, Steve in G+ BB Community!)


  1. I’ve produced a prediction without the use of any advanced hardware:

    Either this thing is the most revolutionary device since agriculture(just imagine, for example, the …impact… on global capital markets of accurate pricing information 8 years in advance), or it’s a treknobabble version of Madame Psychic’s House of Tarot Scams(and given the restrictions on witchcraft in some jurisidictions, I can definitely see a market for that…).

    My guess is #2.

    1. P.T.Barnum may have been an American, but suckers are born every minute, everywhere around the world.  And paraphrasing Anthony Boucher’s quote about the essence of magic being deceit, the question is which side of the sucker rule this guy is on.

  2. I predict that they will ask for funding.  
    I say, make billions playing the stock market, the lottery and horse races then tell us about your invention while throwing fist-fulls of Wilsons in the air and screaming “suck the future, bitches”
    …then I’ll believe you.

  3. Interesting to see this completely uncritical article from the Telegraph.  On another topic about predicting the future, they have headlines such as “Is the global warming scare the greatest delusion in history?”

  4. Funny, I read this as a reactionary rag finding a way to make us laugh at those silly, backwards Iranians. Hur, hur, they’re a bunch of idjits, let’s go bomb their sorry asses.

    It’s the same kind of propaganda you expect in an Iranian paper, featuring some nutter from the Midlands who has invented a way to grow giant badgers and promising to use them to revolutionize agriculture.

    (FWIW, all cultures seem to have lunatics. Some, like the Iranians, put them in charge. We in the West, however, lock them away and for our leaders only choose people of wisdom and clear vision and .. uh … oh, shit.)

    1.  Bingo. The Telegraph isn’t that gullible, this wouldn’t be news at all if certain somebodies weren’t trying to get a war on with Iran. (Although CNN–I think it was?–did run a story on some guys who found Bigfoot a few years ago…)

  5. “The reason that we are not launching our prototype at this stage is that the
    Chinese will steal the idea and produce it in millions overnight.”  —  That explains it.

  6. And that’s how Iran built the jet of the future, naturally. It also magically photoshopped itself into pictures of Iranian landscape, because that’s where it will be, retroactively.

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