Man with pince-nez & smart suit hurls trusses disdainfully

They just don't make ads like this anymore. "Guy with pince-nez" is great visual shorthand for "Authority figure."

Contest Entry.. Away with trusses!


  1. Man with pince-nez & smart suit mesmerizes trusses and causes them to float midair with the power of his mind!

  2. I wrote to that address to get my free book of advice, but all they keep sending me is burritos, which if anything, add to my rupturing… 

  3. I do not envy people of past eras their medical technologies. Yikes. I’ll have my er, rupture operated on, thanks. 

  4. In the words of Spike Milligan, ” Thank you for your support. I shall wear it always.”

  5. “Get rid of that truss! New, from RonCo – Nugget Nuzzlers! never feel so ‘handled’ again!”

  6. Could someone tell me what the hell this thing is talking about?! ‘Ruptures’? Trusses? And what or who is a ‘Prince-nez’? Is that like a male princess? A rupture in your pants? Is it to hold up your socks? I can’t make any sense of this, it’s just bizarre.

    1.  “Pince-nez” is the kind of glasses Mr. Angry-Teddy-Roosevelt-Lookalike here is wearing, the glasses with no temples, just staying on my pinching your nose (that’s what ‘pince-nez’ means, in french.)

  7. Were hernias so prevalent as to spawn a billion dollar (in today’s dollars) industry? In all my life, I’ve only know one person with a hernia of any sort, and, well… hmm… okay, I admit it, I know about 3 people, which means hernias must affect at least 33% of the population.

    1. My theory is that “hernia” was a euphemism for one or more ailments of the “downstairs area” that were considered taboo in the society of that time.

  8. Any time I read the word “rupture” I hear it in a Stephen King character’s voice:   “Sent him home with a fuckin’ rupture.”

    What’s the literary/lexical equivalent of an earworm?

  9. you can still get the book mentioned in the ad.  pdf instead of cloth-bound, but…

  10. “Guaranteed to hold at all times – including when you are working, taking a bath, etc.”  

    ‘Etc.’ is another way to spell sex. 

  11. What if God was one of us?
    Just a stranger on a bus?
    Get a hernia, wear a truss
    Jersey towns like Paramus
    And there’s also Hohokus
    Gravel-voiced Snuffleupagus

  12. I’m just glad to live in a time when a ‘rupture’ is fairly easily treated in a minor surgery, instead of a new cross to bear for the rest of your uncomfortable life.

Comments are closed.