Beavers bite Belarusian, who bleeds to death


21 Responses to “Beavers bite Belarusian, who bleeds to death”

  1. tomrigid says:

    It’s about time the beaver snaps back. They’ve been getting slammed for years.

  2. Jason says:

    Well of course they would attack back

  3. Quiet Wyatt says:


  4. peregrinus says:

    Now there’s a lesson for the smartphone teen.

  5. Nadreck says:

    Well it’s things like this that are why we Canucks made them our National Critter!  Plus they’re engineers!

  6. booknerd says:

    Missing from your summary is the fact that the beaver, at least in this case, was attacked FIRST. Yep, some idiot decided to GRAB a fifty-pound WILD ANIMAL with teeth that can shear through inch-thick wood like it’s BUTTER, just so he could have his picture taken. Hellloooo, Darwin!

  7. Astin44 says:

    Seems more like people are attacking Beavers in Belarus and the Beavers are fighting back.

    • miasm says:

       I liked your comment but only because I misread it as:
      “Seems like people are attacking Beavers in Belarus and the Beavers are fighting back”

      I apologise for making this point but I thought the pure statement of fact to be surreal and exhilarating,

  8. ldobe says:

    They also are constantly growing.  Beavers need to bite and chew constantly.  If they don’t, they’ll die.  These are animals with a blood lust.  They have a sawzall in their mouth, and aren’t afraid to use it.

    Also, leave wild animals alone, kids.  They may look cute and cuddly, but the vast majority want nothing to do with you, and those that naturally do are out to eat you.  Human habituation is unhealthy for the animals, and unnecessary when you can enjoy them from a respectful distance in the wild.

  9. jgs says: :

    November 26

    Today I made a Black Forest cake out of five pounds of cherries and a live beaver, challenging the very definition of the word “cake.” I was very pleased. Malraux said he admired it greatly, but could not stay for dessert. Still, I feel that this may be my most profound achievement yet, and have resolved to enter it in the Betty Crocker Bake-Off.

    November 30

    Today was the day of the Bake-Off. Alas, things did not go as I had hoped. During the judging, the beaver became agitated and bit Betty Crocker on the wrist. The beaver’s powerful jaws are capable of felling blue spruce in less than ten minutes and proved, needless to say, more than a match for the tender limbs of America’s favorite homemaker. I only got third place. Moreover, I am now the subject of a rather nasty lawsuit.

    (By the way, is there anywhere that lists the formatting codes that work when posting on BB? Or is one just supposed to know it by osmosis?)

  10. Randy Walters says:

    Some days you bite the beaver, and some days the beaver bites you.

  11. Winona unavailable for comment.

  12. Dlo Burns says:

    Aren’t beavers native to north america? Does this mean they’ll start culling the euro-beavers?

    • AlexG55 says:

       2 separate species. North American beavers are Castor canadensis, European ones are Castor fiber. They can’t interbreed.

  13. dgeske says:

    A Møøse once bit my sister …

  14. Belarusian Bitten By Beaver Bleeds Badly, Becomes Body

    Alliteration ‘R’ Us.

  15. TheMudshark says:

    In related news, last week some guy got bitten to death by two donkeys in Hungary. Eastern European wildlife is mobilizing.

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