Amusing Reddit thread: "If companies had realistic slogans what would they be?"

Nearly 20,000 responses to the question, "If companies had realistic slogans what would they be?"—and many of them quite funny. (via @pesce)

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  1. McDonald’s:  We make you fat and stupid.  
    Facebook:  Privacy?  What privacy?  
    Google:  All Your Data Belongs To Us.  

    1. Snarky Users – “Making It Difficult For BoingBoing Editors To Entertain Them For Free”

      1. Snarky Users – “Making sure you read the comments, too”.

        Free Entertainment – “A thinly-disguised padding between the ads since times immemorial”.

    1. Disney: Bringing together families and disabled Americans since the founding of Craigslist.

    1. Heh. They did save the best for last in that skit. And it’s probably best because it’s so true.

    1. A perfectly accurate, but equally snarky one would be:
      Hummer: Exactly the same leg room as a VW Beetle.

  2. British Petroleum: Yeah, We’re Sorry. What Are You Gonna Do About It?

    Fukushima: Yeah, We’re Sorry. What Are You Gonna Do About It?

    Exxon: Yeah, We’re Sorry. What Are You Gonna Do About It?

    . . . 

  3. I suppose it depends on how you define “realistic slogans” … for example, the aforementioned “McDonalds: we make you fat and stupid”, while true, is probably not their intent. Their intent is to get your hooked on cheap addicting food.. 

    When it comes down to it, probably almost every company can boil down to “doing whatever we can get away with it to make money for our shareholders” … but that isn’t as much fun as all the responses :)

  4. Archer Daniels Midland: We brag about extracting vitamin C from corn.  We then sell you quasi-food products made from corn that lacks vitamin C, as well as vitamin C supplements at a considerable mark-up.

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