Thinkgeek's Crovel Extreme II is an "extreme shovel" -- as in "extremely lethal." It's basically a cross between a field shovel and a crowbar, but it also sports a hammer, woodworking chisel, saw, and bottle opener, and comes with an optional "super spike" add-on, whose nominal purpose is to " break ice, split wood, breach walls, and chip rocks or cement more effectively." But as Rob Bricken points out, that spike gives the crovel a serious similarity to the zombie-killing weapon deployed by Lobo in Max Brooks's World War Z. The crovel with spike is $170, which is a non-trivial sum, even for such a handsome chimera, but on the plus side, there's no shipping charge. Depending on your partner's proclivities, this could just be the most romantic Valentine's Day gift in the history of love itself.