Former Gizmodo gadget writer and chief editorial whip-cracker Brian Lam has covered many a CES in his time; since leaving Gawker media for ocean adventures and his Wirecutter electronics blog, I think his work has become much more interesting. He revisited CES this year, and produced exactly one post from it, highlighting interesting stuff he says he'd actually buy himself. The "luggage tracker" and HD camera are tugging at my credit card's heartstrings, too.

A bunch of people sit and stand around at CES. Photo: REUTERS/Rick Wilking

This year's Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas offered few surprises, giving reporters time to write interesting offbeat coverage. Stars in the firmament of boredom included Mat Honan, Brian Lam, and the marvelous CESTrailer Twitter account.

Every year, however, readers ask about the nitty-gritty details of the show, beyond the gadgets but short of the existential despair. Having not attended this year and thereby being free of fresh scars, I thought I'd have a stab at describing the mundane details of how it goes.

If nothing else, you won't be curious anymore.

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The Consumer Electronics Show in Vegas is ongoing, and it's been widely-hailed as the dullest in years. There are only three things you need to read about it.

Brian Lam at Wirecutter: The magical (and sometimes ridiculous) gadgets of tomorrow

The first thing I notice every year when I settle into a hotel at CES is that no matter how fancy the hotel, the tap water smells like eggs

Mat Honan at Gizmodo: Fever Dream of a Guilt-Ridden Gadget Reporter

CES attendees are overwhlemingly men. Men are filthy, especially when they've been drinking too much coffee and eating Vegas buffets. So I duck into the ladies' room.

@CESTrailer:

(OK, so Wired also has a great roundup of the new ultraportables, and The Verge is knocking it out the park on general coverage if you really need to know about the televisions. But everything else about CES sucks this year. Oh! Except this camera.)