“I Would Love To Live In A Country Where…” perfectly encapsulates the 2016 election

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Ijeoma Oluo’s latest for The Establishment is one of the best, most empathetic pieces I have read on this election. Here's an excerpt:

I would really love it if I lived in a country where bragging about sexually assaulting women on tape would disqualify you from the presidency.

I would really love it if I lived in a country where being an unapologetic White Supremacist would disqualify you from the presidency.

I would love it if almost 50% of the country weren’t currently openly supporting placing hate in the highest office of our land.

I would love it if we could talk about Trump without someone mentioning Bill Clinton, as if it’s not fair that we’d elect one rapist and not another.

I would really love it if Hillary had believed women.

I would really love it if people didn’t call the women who support bad men “even worse” than the bad men who are choosing with their own free will to commit bad deeds.

I would really love it if I never heard someone say “boys will be boys” ever again.

You can read Oluo’s full piece over on The Establishment.

[Imagine via fivethirtyeight.com] Read the rest

There's a "Garbage Pail Kids" Topps card set for the 2016 Presidential Race, and it's pretty great


Topps has released a 2016 Presidential campaign themed "Garbage Pail Kids" edition. They're updating the series pretty quickly! There's already a Donald Trump vs. Alicia Machado card.

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Lin-Manuel Miranda makes a one-act musical out of a single run-on Trump sentence


It's got a catchy beat, I could dance to it! (And Peggy!) Read the rest

Michelle Obama's passport leaked in new hack blamed on Russia


An image identified as a scanned copy of U.S. first lady Michelle Obama’s passport was published online today by "DC Leaks," along with personal emails associated with a man identified as a “low-level White House staffer who worked with Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign.”

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Unskew the polls! Trumpkins claim they're rigged

Titt Rumpney. Illo: Beschizza

In the 2012 election, as it became clear Barack Obama was polling better than Mittens Romney, it was claimed the polls were "skewed" in favor of Democratic candidates. Turned out that the polls underestimated Obama's margin of victory. But with Donald Trump trailing Hillary Clinton in similar fashion four years on, the "unskewers" are back. Read the rest

Trump reboot: ditch populism, adopt Republican platform, say Clinton is the crazy one

Illo: Rob Beschizza

Donald Trump, sinking lately in the polls, is to "reboot" his campaign, writes the Wall Street Journal.

Part of the issue for the New York businessman is that he has run his campaign much like his family business, with his grown children as his top counselors and surrogates. That has meant he hasn’t developed a strong connective tissue to party stalwarts and activists that can sustain a candidate through difficult times. Reports of Republicans leaving the party, lining up behind Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson or even backing Mrs. Clinton gained momentum last week, after the nominee criticized the parents of a U.S. soldier killed in Iraq.

This means he's going to be more of a good ol' Republican: less talk of China and returning jobs to the heartland, more talk of freeing banks from regulation and "strengthening intellectual property protections" and other exciting policies sure to delight the Trumpkin base.

Trump will take direct aim at the Clintons and Obama, pointing to Detroit as an example of their failed economic policies. He will argue that their “record-breaking pace of new regulations, tax increases, restrictions on private-energy production and one-sided trade deals” have hurt Detroit and other cities, according to excerpts of his remarks shared with Bloomberg Politics. He will call Obama’s Clinton-backed regulations a “lead-weight on the economy, an anchor dragging us down.” And he will say that Americans “need to hit the pause buttons on these regulations so our businesses can reinvest in the economy.”

After all, the GOP is still his to lead, whatever their paper scruples used to be. Read the rest

Watch GOP strategist Liz Mair call Trump a "loudmouthed dick" on live TV


THIS is CNN. (Thanks, UPSO!)

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Vic Berger Election Special with Tim Heidecker: The Conventions

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Vic Berger and Tim Heidecker’s epic RNC special is terrifying and hilarious.

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All the best parts of Donald Trump's speech to the Republican National Convention

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Anthony Clune put together a highlight reel of the most interesting and salient moments from last night's keynote address at the Republican National Convention, in which Donald Trump accepted the party's nomination for United States President. Read the rest

The failed presidential campaign of Ted Cruz is like the fight to end slavery, says Heidi Cruz

Ted Cruz. So gross.
On a conference call with the Ted Cruz campaign's National Prayer Team, the presidential candidate's wife Heidi Cruz said the fight to get her unelectable husband elected is pretty much exactly like the long and difficult battle to abolish slavery. This makes perfect sense in Ted Cruz World. And that's why he's unfit to govern anything but Ted Cruz World, and not America.

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Powerful photographic portraits of Veterans For Bernie Sanders


My photographer friend Clayton Cubitt, whom I met here in the Boing Boing comments a decade ago, did an amazing project to support the campaign of U.S. presidential candidate Bernie Sanders.

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Sweaty realdoll Marco Rubio quits Republican race


Thrashed by Donald Trump in today's Florida GOP primary election, Marco Rubio is quitting the race to be the party's pick to run for President. The NYT reports that his youth did him in.

And one crucial shortcoming was out of his control: his youth. Many Republicans were simply unwilling to entrust the presidency to a young first-term senator.

Mr. Rubio’s campaign was a cycle of high hopes and dashed expectations. He finished an unexpectedly strong third in the Iowa caucuses, only to be embarrassed in a debate three days before the New Hampshire primary, consigning him to fifth place . He came in second to Mr. Trump in South Carolina, then was y to be all but wiped out in the Super Tuesday contests 10 days later

Nope. Read the rest

Polls: Clinton and Sanders tied in Nevada

Former U.S. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton speaks at the University of Miami in Florida

One recent poll's dead heat was confirmed by another this morning, placing Bernie Sanders only one point behind Democrat rival Hillary Clinton in the run-up to the Nevada caucus.

CNN's poll puts Sanders at 47% and Clinton at 48%; last week's Washington Free Beacon had them both at 45%

The Observer reports that Hillary was way ahead until very recently and that it looks more likely Sanders will score an upset.

One of the most interesting questions that will be answered in the coming weeks, beginning with the Nevada caucus and South Carolina primary, will be the number of young black and Hispanic voters who turn to Mr. Sanders in the same way most young white voters have supported him in Iowa and New Hampshire. My guess is this number will be larger than most insider establishment pundits expect.

Third, while Mr. Sanders has campaigned throughout Nevada for his positive agenda to create a political revolution that will make the American economy less rigged and more fair, Ms. Clinton has become a largely negative candidate with nonstop 24/7 attacks against Mr. Sanders that harden the low favorability and high distrust ratings plaguing her candidacy.

A typical "practical Hillary" messaging blunder: yesterday, Chelsea Clinton, campaigning for her mother, took aim at Sanders' penal reform plans. Whatever she meant, it was reported as her lecturing minorities why America must mass-incarcerate them. An unfair press, or a tin ear on her own base? Read the rest

Trump and Sanders take New Hampshire


Republican Donald Trump and Democrat Bernie Sanders won their respective primary elections in New Hampshire today. Trump, with about a third of the votes, prevailed over John Kasich, with Ted Cruz and Jeb Bush in a virtual tie for third as of 10:30 p.m. Sanders won 58% of the Democrat vote, to Hillary Clinton's 40%; Clinton's concession speech was well-received and conciliatory, suggesting that the ground underfoot has definitively moved left.

Somewhere, Chris Christie is bullying an underling, burning himself out so he can quit without looking like a total asshole on TV. His greatest achievement in the race, nuking Marco Rubio's surge from orbit, offers a delicious irony: no-one has ever so completely proven that debates matter, yet gained so little from having done so. There are now many "Marco Rubio robot" nicknames in circulation. The correct one is Rubot.

Meanwhile, in old Hampshire, English coastguards have told children to stop playing on the beach during storms, and a legendary local stray cat that lived at a bus stop died of "horrific injuries," having been run over, possibly by a bus.

Update: beaten to it by Xeni. Read the rest

Ben Carson has nutty theories about the Egyptian pyramids


According to this 1998 commencement address Ben Carson gave at Andrews University, the "flagship educational institution of the Seventh-day Adventist Church," he says that the "scientists" who claim that extraterrestrials who built the pyramids are mistaken. And they weren't burial chambers for the Pharoas either. Rather, the pyramids were brilliantly engineered to store grain. From CNN:

"My own personal theory is that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain," Carson said in taped remarks first reported by Buzzfeed on Wednesday. "Now all the archeologists think that they were made for the pharaohs' graves. But, you know, it would have to be something awfully big if you stop and think about it."

On Wednesday, asked about his belief after a book-signing in Florida, Carson stood by his theory and explained it.

"The pyramids were made in a way that they had hermetically sealed compartments," he said. "You would need that if you were trying to preserve grain for a long period of time."

Donald Trump commented on Carson's theory about the pyramids on Thursday during an appearance on MSNBC, saying, "I'll have to put that into my repertoire when I talk about Ben...That was a strange deal."

According to the Book of Genesis, Joseph stored large amounts of grain to feed the people of Egypt during a famine.

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REM's Michael Stipe to Trump et al.: "Go fuck yourselves!"

"Go fuck yourselves, the lot of you — you sad, attention-grabbing, power-hungry little men," Stipe said, responding to Trump playing REM's hit "It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)" at a rally yesterday. Read the rest

Need a new reason to hate Donald Trump? His speaker fee is a quarter million bucks


Donald Trump earns roughly $250,000 per speech, and owes $265 million (maybe more) in debt. Read the rest

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