While eating man's face, Florida 'cannibal killer' wore Trump 'Make America Great Again' hat

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On Monday night, 19 year old Austin Kelly Harrouff of Florida went homicidally berserk for reasons yet unknown. He stabbed to death a random couple twice his age, also attacking a neighbor who tried to intervene. Then Austin began biting the dead man's face off.

Horrible new details are out today. When Austin's frightened mom called 911 to report his erratic, menacing behavior with family, she told the emergency dispatcher that her son was wearing a Donald Trump “Make America Great Again” hat when he wandered off into the night ranting about being a superhero. And in a YouTube video uploaded before the attack, he spoke to the camera about bodybuilding and steroids, and of taking “a lot of shrooms.”

A person familiar with the family gave reporters two snapchats Austin sent out hours before the attack. The snapchats show him making faces for the camera with the words "Trump" and "the horse" captioning the images.

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Florida student, 19, kills older couple and eats man's face off while “grunting and growling”

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We don't know what may have caused a young Florida man to commit a gruesome attack late Monday night. We do know how the victims died. It was gruesome. The details that follow may be disturbing.

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Police notice alligator foot dangling out of Florida man's car dash, and bust him for killing it

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A man in Florida was cited by state wildlife officers for killing an alligator without a permit after an inspection revealed gator body parts in his pickup truck, and the poor dead critter's foot sticking out of the dashboard.

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Florida man arrested in FBI sting over “weapon of mass destruction” synagogue bombing plans

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A man in Florida was arrested last week for planning to use “a weapon of mass destruction” at a synagogue near Miami, federal authorities said today. The ill-fated words that James Gonzalo Medina reportedly uttered to the undercover FBI agent who sold him a fake explosive device, words which will likely seal the suspect's fate: “I’m ready, bro!”

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Florida man catches 400-pound Goliath Grouper fish with a wrench

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His tool of choice: a DIY wrench lure. It's a wrench, string, and two fishing hooks. With only this tool, Florida man Ryan Hein was able to reel in a 400-pound Goliath grouper while fishing in the St. Petersburg area.

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Florida homophobe desperately begs for attention

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A homophobic guy in Florida, of all places, has changed his name to "Bruce Jenner." He barely closets his intolerance in a ridiculous theory about returning this precious name to earlier glory.

This excerpt, from the Sun Sentinel, reads as a list of scorn worthy people.

This Bruce Jenner was formerly Mark Behar, an actor and bodyguard who legally had his name changed in order to preserve the “heterosexual roots” of Jenner’s original name, according to a statement from his publicist, Tom Madden.

"We're representing Mark who is now legally Bruce so the famous Bruce Jenner name will return to its heterosexual roots where our client believes it belongs instead of hanging around out with the likes of the Kardashians and getting into car accidents as Caitlyn," Madden was quoted saying in a press release from TransMedia Group, the PR firm representing the former Behar.

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Alaska woman steals patrol car in which her just-arrested husband is handcuffed

Amber Watford, 28, of Big Lake Alaska, and Joshua Watford, 38.
Alaska Woman is giving Florida Man a run for his money.

Former Florida cop fired for KKK ties got a new job working in a Florida elementary school

David Borst is now out of a job.
The FBI found no criminal wrongdoing, or evidence that any other officers were involved with the KKK.

Florida Man crowned winner of 2015 Ernest Hemingway lookalike contest

In this Saturday, July 25, 2015 photo provided by the Florida Keys News Bureau, Charlie Boice, center, is congratulated by previous victors after winning the 2015 "Papa" Hemingway Look-Alike Contest at Sloppy Joe's Bar in Key West, Fla. Boice finally won the contest after trying for 15 years, beating out 121 other entrants following two preliminary rounds, a semi-final and two final rounds. The competition was a facet of the island's annual Hemingway Days festival that ends Sunday, July 26. Planting a playful snook on Boice is Wally Cox, left, the 2014 winner. (Andy Newman/Florida Keys News Bureau)
A retired air traffic controller won the "Papa" Hemingway Look-Alike Contest on his 15th attempt.

Florida man dislikes sea turtles, shoots a volunteer protecting their nest

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A 72-year-old Marine veteran who volunteered to protect a sea turtle nest got beaten and shot in the butt for his troubles. Turtle-hater Michael Q. McAuliffe was arrested. Read the rest

Watch: Florida man steals ice cream freezer from under nose of sleeping clerk

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A possibly inebriated gentleman went to a service station, spit on the floor, raised his middle finger to the security camera and looked straight into it for a few seconds, wiped his gob on his T-shirt, then dragged away a large ice cream freezer, all while the clerk sawed wood at the pay window.

Authorities arrested Dennis Norman on grand theft charges on April 22. He was released from jail on $1,000 bond.

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Carl Hiaasen's BAD MONKEY, now in paperback!

Carl Hiaasen's amazing comic novel, Bad Monkey, is now out in paperback; I reviewed it last year in hardcover: Read the rest

Florida Man attempting to rob bank leaves behind job application form with username, password

Felipe Cruz mugshot, courtesy Pompano Beach, Florida police, via Sun-Sentinel.

A man tried to rob a Chase Bank in Pompano Beach, Florida on April 10. He selected a teller behind bulletproof glass who refused to give him money, and presented a robbery note with his demands: "Give me the 100s 50s 20s now. Do not set the alarm. Hurry!!!" When the teller rebuffed him, he ran away but left his stickup note behind.

His demands had been penned on the back of an online job application form, complete with the handwritten username of CRUZFELIPE36. It also included a password, Gioielli stated in a federal criminal complaint.
Police are still looking for Felipe Cruz. Read the rest