US governors vow to protect citizens from mass-shooters if they are Syrian


Pete Reynolds in McSweeney's, proving that humor is a better source of news than the news is: "I refuse to support special interest groups whose sole mission is to profit from putting weapons into the hands of people, if those people are Syrians." Read the rest

Donald Trump Lorem Ipsum generator


Todd writes, "I made this ridiculous thing. Click on his head for more lorem."

Read the rest

House GOP defends the right of racist car-dealers to overcharge people of color


House Bill HR1737 will create penalties for auto-lenders who substantially overcharge black and latino customers through gouging on dealer markups. Read the rest

Craiglist ad for new Speaker of the House


Rep Mark Takano [D-CA] posted a help wanted ad to Craigslist seeking a new Speaker for the House of Representatives, a position that's been vacant since Speaker Boehner dropped the mic and walked out on the "ungovernable" radical Tea Party/Freedom Caucus mess that is the Congressional Republican Party.

It seems like we’re having a hard time finding the next Speaker, so I created a Craigslist ad to boost our search. [@repmarktakano/Twitter]

(via Amac) Read the rest

Canadian Tories funneled $8M in tax money to US Republican Party's NGO


Under the Stephen Harper government, $8M was given to the John McCain-chaired International Republican Institute, a non-governmental organization started by the US Republican party to advocate for right-wing policies abroad. Read the rest

How a billionaire GOP rainmaker tried (and failed) to rewrite history by suing Mother Jones


Frank VanderSloot is a major Republican donor -- he funneled more than $1M to the Romney campaign -- who is tapped to be one of the kingmakers in the party's leadership race. But the multi-level marketing nutritional supplement billionaire has a dark history he'd like to erase: his many, high-profile, vicious campaigns against gay people. Read the rest

Megachurch televangelists lay hands on Donald Trump, ask Jesus to vote for him


GOP presidential candidate and noted scumbag Donald Trump met with a bunch of televangelists, Tea Party “teavangelicals,” and preacher profiteers at his Trump Tower office Monday afternoon.

The elite group, which included some megachurch chiefs who have previously been investigated by the federal government for misuse of donations, prayed while performing the “laying on of hands” to infuse him with the Holy Spirit. The goal: Jesus, get our man elected. Read the rest

Lemony Snicket gives Planned Parenthood $1M


Daniel Handler (who wrote the excellent "Series of Unfortunate Events" books under the name Lemony Snicket) and his wife, Lisa Brown, announced the $1 million gift to Planned Parenthood on the eve of a possible Congressional shutdown over funding to the agency. Read the rest

Rush Limbaugh: water on Mars is a leftist conspiracy


Who needs the Onion? "Don't know how long it's going to take, but this news that there is flowing water on Mars is somehow going to find its way into a technique to advance the leftist agenda." Read the rest

Carly Fiorina boasts: I sold the NSA its mass-surveillance servers


When National Security Agency director Michael Hayden told then-CEO-of-HP/now-Republican-presidential-hopeful Carly Fiorina he needed servers to put the entire USA under unconstitutional surveillance, she leapt into action to supply him with the materiel he needed. Read the rest

Kentucky Republican state Senator: the First Amendment protects my right to receive bribes


Republican Kentucky state Sen. John Schickel is suing to overturn the state's ethics laws so that he can accept gifts worth more than $1,000 from lobbyists without reporting them, because he thinks the current ethics rules violate his First and Fourteenth Amendment rights. Read the rest

GOP Vice Chair of House Energy committee is a climate denier and creationist


Marsha Blackburn has represented Tennessee's 7th district for more than a decade, on behalf of the Republican party, whose caucus has elevated her to the vice-chair of the House Committee on Energy and Commerce. Read the rest

How is this Ted Cruz poster not totally homoerotic and weird for a presidential candidate?


“Blacklisted and Lovin' It.” $50 on the official site. Jezebel has the backstory. Still would not have sex with.

[HT: Christian Nightmares] Read the rest

Survivor bandmembers “gobsmacked” at Kim Davis and Mike Huckabee using 'Eye of the Tiger' at rally

Sylvester Stallone in the movie "Rocky 2."
Survivor guitarist and “Eye of the Tiger” co-writer Frankie Sullivan says nobody in their camp granted permission for their 1982 hit song to be featured at a rally for Kim Davis without their permission.

Kim Davis welcome out of jail rally played “Eye of the Tiger” theme song


Gay-hatin' Lord-fearin' American Martyr Kim Davis and former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee celebrate Davis' release from jail with an overused '80s sports anthem. Read the rest

GOP "kingmaker" proposes enslavement as an answer to undocumented migrants

Jan Mickelson hosts one of Iowa's top talk-radio shows and has entertained many of the GOP's nomination hopefuls who want his endorsement for the all-important Iowa primary. Read the rest

Jeb Bush: the NSA isn't spying on us enough

Because "evildoers." Read the rest

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