Video of comedian "punched" after racist routine goes viral again

In this 2012 video, comedian Brett Eidman dons a mask depicting stereotypical Asian features, performs an Asian-themed routine, harangues an Asian couple in the front row, and is punched in the face. The video's gone viral overnight, years after the initial 15 minutes of infamy.

The whole thing was staged, but at the time it wasn't quite so obvious. Gawker tried to get the bottom of it, concluding that it doesn't matter whether it's a hoax or not: he's an asshole irrespective of how "ironic" his bullshit it. Rich Juzwiak:

If the punching video above is a hoax, fuck this guy. He's gloating while admitting that telling racist jokes is an asshole thing to do that will get your ass punched. It's also the worst way possible to launch a career: did this guy learn nothing from Michael Richards?

If this isn't a hoax, fuck this guy harder.

The clip is Eidman's only real fame, but he apparently makes a decent living in insurance and the comedy circuit and was profiled in 2016, by an acquaintance who reports being shocked to find him star in one of "the dumbest, most offensive pieces I’ve seen a “comedian” make", a "a shockingly unfunny character he says is based on infomercial personality Tom Vu."

Basically, Eidman doesn't get it. He thinks it's mocking racism; it's just a joke.

SPLITSIDER: Do you feel that this was an ill-timed bit? Like, in your mind, if you had done this 25 years before, would it have been successful?

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NBC to go ahead with Alex Jones interview

Megyn Kelly, formerly of Fox News and now at NBC, interviewed Alex Jones, erstwhile conspiracy theorist and Sandy Hook truther. It hasn't been broadcast yet, but posted excerpts suggest a smarmy effort to elevate Jones to mainstream attention, an amoral stunt posed as casting sunlight on darkness. NBC's deployment of Jones' nasty brand of bullshit, where the parents of slaughtered children are liars working to destroy Americans' right to own guns, is not going down well, but Kelly has little patience for critics.

The spectacle has many on the internet wondering where the bottom is. Spoiler: there is no bottom.

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Dog facebutts stationary truck

The dog is fine, reports owner Billy Hammonds, after being taken for a checkup at the vet. Read the rest

Tourist kicks over annoying 10-million-year old stalagmite

An irritating and frankly dangerous hazard at the popular caves in Tongren City, China, was finally dealt with recently by an enterprising tourist. And they want to track him down and fine him! For getting rid of a useless piece of rock growing for millions of years one mineral-laden drop at a time! No good deed goes unpunished. Read the rest

Watch the insane pro-Trump political ad running today against Jim Comey

The election, for Trump, will never be over, and today he's running against former FBI Director James Comey. Comey is testifying today that the president is (in brief) a lying weirdo who wanted him to ask for his job, to pledge loyalty, to clear him publicly, and to end the investigation into his Russian-entangled surrogates. The Great America Alliance, a pro-Trump political action committee, is running a campaign-style ad against Comey today depicting him as a showboater who struggles with the facts. Read the rest

Republican congressman-elect Greg Gianforte writes apology to reporter he punched and bodyslammed

After physically attacking a reporter and allowing his spokesman to lie about it in an official statement, Republican congressman-elect Greg Gianforte has formally apologized to his victim. He is also donating $50,000 to the Committee to Protect Journalists.

"My physical response to your legitimate question was unprofessional, unacceptable, and unlawful. As both a candidate for Office and a public official, I should be held to a high standard in my interactions with the press and the public. My treatment of you did not meet that standard."

"I made a mistake and humbly ask for your forgiveness," the letter stated.

Jacobs accepted the apology.

Gianforte still faces assault charges over the attack. Read the rest

Microwaved glowstick experiment goes awry

There's something magical about this 2014 video, which very suddenly goes from one YouTube genre (the intringuing at-home science experiment) to another (reality is disaster). You wonder why there aren't more of them out there! Read the rest

Inexpensive keyboard has two settings: “OFF” and “NO”

The mechanical Royal Kludge keyboard (Update: in stock here) seems to do well with Amazon reviewers, but there are no guarantees you'll receive one with the coveted OFF/NO switch. Read the rest

Guy from Tinder doesn't look like his pics

Lane Loomis posted a scary story about how manners and expectations lead us into danger, especially when one person has all of one and none of the other.

I walked down to the front door of my building and there was a man there who looked nothing like “Jamie”. The thing about being a woman is that pleasing people is in your blood. From a young age you’re taught that not being liked by a guy is the worst possible thing. No one tells you why this is so bad, or even what would happen that’s so terrible about a guy not liking you. You just have this instinct to do it. It’s hard to go against.

So I saw this guy down there, and I had studied Jamie’s Tinder photos for the last hour since we started talking. I knew it wasn’t the same guy and I was confused about it. But I also didn’t turn around and go lock myself in my apartment. I did the stupid thing. I did the thing that women do and I went down and opened the door and smiled at him.

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Reminder: don't eat fidget spinners

Fox News reports that a girl in Texas nearly choked on a fidget spinner that she had put in her mouth. Her mom looked over to see the child red-faced and drooling, and had to rush her to hospital to get the quarter-sized toy removed from her esophagus.

“From this I wish to offer some word of caution to parents,” Joniec posted. “Fidget spinners are the current craze so they are widely distributed. Kids of all ages may be getting them, but not all spinners come with age-appropriate warnings. The bushings pop out easily, so if you have young kids (under 8 yr old) keep in mind that these present a potential choking hazard.”

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Review: Mainstays $9 portable electric burner

Mainstays Single Burner is a portable electric coil hotplate you can buy for $9 at Walmart (and Amazon). It has a 1m two-prong cord, an adjustable power control (temperatures are not marked) and rubber feet.

I tested it with a steel stock pot with 8 quarts of water.

After turning up the heat I watched it for a while. It got the water to about 160 degrees but it was only slowly rising and I doubt it would have gotten to a boil. Touching the steel to observe the element, I felt a strange tingling, rippling sensation in my arm.

“That’s odd,” I thought, lifting the pot up to look at the element. The sensation left me. Part of the element glowed red but mostly it remained dark. I placed the pot back on the element and the moment it touched it that weird tingle shot up my arm again.

“Oh, I’m being electrified,” I said, “because I bought a $9 electric burner from fucking Walmart.” Read the rest

Only recording of Hitler's normal voice

In movies and television, Hitler's speaking voice is usually depicted as a dialed-back version of his public speaking performances: even in private he's either shrieking or muttering. The reality, captured only once in a secret recording made in Finland, is unnerving. It's deep and commanding, yet with the same maniacal rhythms. You almost forget that he's admitting, in 1942, that he underestimated Soviet productive capability and would have ignored anyone who told him. Read the rest

Trump threatens Comey on Twitter, suggests he has "tapes" of their conversations

President Donald Trump, having fired FBI Director James Comey in what he admits was an effort to stymie the Bureau's investigation into links between Trump's presidential campaign and Russia, is now threatening him on Twitter.

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Trump admits firing Comey to impede investigation into "Trump and Russia"

In an interview with NBC News, president Donald Trump let slip the real reason he fired FBI Director James Comey – a reason all know and understand, but which was so far fig-leaved by various lurching cover stories.

Why didn't Lester Holt follow-up on each gift of a response from Trump? Because Lester Holt is incapable of reacting to even the most revealingly stupid answers. He just moves on to the next question. Trump could have said "Putin told me to have him found in a ditch, but you know, we can be subtle," and Holt would have stared at him a moment, then asked "Were you angry with Comey?"

Which leads us to an important reminder, the thing Trump knows that gives him the security to just blather out any answer he believes will make him look reasonable right now: nothing will happen. Read the rest

MMA fighter's quick defeat of traditional martial artist "leaves China reeling"

The BBC reports a quick outcome to a televised bout fought between Xu Xiaodong, a practitioner of modern mixed martial arts, and Wei Lei, a Tai Chi master. It was over in a few seconds, with a few more of the traditionalist, hopelessly outmatched, shielding himself on the ground.

Millions of people have since watched video footage of the competition, and it has triggered a huge discussion in China on whether traditional martial arts - or wushu - can ever truly be effective in combat. Tai chi is now associated by many with older people, who use the series of movements to improve posture and release stress and anxiety. They can often be seen in Chinese public parks in the morning, slowly stretching out their arms.

But it has been part of Chinese martial arts culture since the 16th Century. Films and TV dramas have historically portrayed martial arts masters as great heroes in conflict, with almost supernatural strength.

Here's the infamous video of Aikido master and telekineticist Yanagi Ryuken, whose (partially apocryphal) $5000 challenge to fight anyone was taken up by an MMA fighter.

The website Bullshido focuses mostly on Westerners exploiting Asian concepts to sell quack fighting techniques to Americans, and has many amusing don't-read-the-comments videos of them at work. The resemblance to Christian revival shows is often uncanny. Read the rest

An Eel in the Keel

1. Chinese man is constipated. 2. Chinese man remembers an old folk remedy. 3. Remedy involves inserting a live eel up your bum. 4. Chinse man goes to hospital.

Seems like a foregone conclusion that if you insert a live eel in your rectum, health problems will ensue! The slippery monster ate through part of the guy’s intestines and went for a swim. The man went to the hospital to have it removed.

I don’t really have to say anymore because here’s a video from Chinese news with a CGI reenactment of the whole fiasco. From the music, the little green cloud, and the gas mask it appears that Chinese news takes this to be a comedic episode. Just remember this the next time you go out for a nice unagi dinner.

Via SoraNews 24.

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Every member of congress's reaction to Trump firing the FBI Director investigating him

@vidiot_ on Twitter compiled 536 reactions from members of Congress into a simple, easily-scanned Google spreadsheet.

Many haven't said a thing. Democrats seem united in criticism of Trump. Republicans are mostly silent on the matter, with a dozen or so on the record. Of those, they're about equally split between praise and criticism of the firing.

Don't expect Congress to do anything about it. Trump's gift is for grift, and the art of grift is in spotting weak assumptions. What do people think can't be done, but have no will or means to punish or prevent? Read the rest

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