If Cormac McCarthy was a Yelp reviewer

Yelping with Cormac is a rather arch and very funny Tumblr with a simple premise: what if Cormac McCarthy was addicted to reviewing restaurants and stores on Yelp?

Whole Foods Market
Noe Valley - San Francisco, CA
Cormac M. | Author | Lost in the chaparral, NM
Four stars.

The sheriff and the posse were now a block away and riding seven abreast rifles in hand and horses snorting and wildeyed. The outlaw dropped his pistol and stiffwalked into the parking lot of a grocery store. Around him young women in skintight sporting clothes stopped and stared.

The ground shook as the posse rode up on the parking lot entrance but the sheriff stopped his riders with a raised hand and sawed his palamino around sending the animal sidestepping like a showhorse into a newspaper box which fell over with a great cacophony. When the noise subsided the neighborhood and the parking lot were silent. The riders and the outlaw and the women frozen like actors in some gypsy roadshow.

A rider wearing an elaborate mustache and carrying a Winchester onehanded nudged his quarterhorse toward the sheriff. Hell he’s right there sheriff.

I know it. Im lookin at him same as you.

What are we waitin for then.

We caint touch him now deputy. They got their own way here.

The riders watched as the women left their station wagons and strollers and encircled the outlaw. As if some ancient instinct united them. Silent as wolves and staring intently at the broken man standing there. He saw his mistake and called out to the riders reaching toward them with his one good arm but was struck down with a savage blow from a rolled yoga mat.

Yelping with Cormac (via Making Light)

Cain Train, Baby: another Tim Heidecker mock campaign jingle featuring Rich Little (audio)

I don't know how Tim Heidecker's gonna top this latest song: "CAIN TRAIN, BABY." Audio's here. Featuring famed voice actor Rich Little.

Heidecker, in case you don't know, is half of "Tim and Eric," and has been cranking out these weird surrealist Herman Cain anti-jingles for a couple weeks now.

Anyway, that's Heidecker, in the sexy photo at left. Follow him on Twitter. And at top, Kevin Ackley made this fan-art homage to the Cain song cycle. An album cover, perchance?

Related: Aaron Preacher whipped up this appropriately surreal fan-video for "Lord Cain," the jingle Heidecker released on Friday night.

Oh, and Herman Cain's sure having a busy day today!

"Lord Cain," by Tim Heidecker (music)

Herman Cain speaks at the Iowa Faith & Freedom Coalition's Presidential Forum in Des Moines, Iowa October 22, 2011. REUTERS/Brian C. Frank.


Because Herman Cain's actual campaign ads just aren't weird enough:

"Lord Cain," an opus by Tim Heidecker (of Tim and Eric fame), as promised.

Download: MP3, Ogg, and other options here. You should follow Tim's Tumblr.

UPDATE: Dylan Mitchell-Funk created a fan-video. Eric Wareheim sure is looking good these days!

Zoomertab 2.0 Activity Tablet

[Video Link] Sure am glad someone posted a copy of this "Timeless Seasons" shopping network clip, so I could share the good news about these ladygadgets with Boing Boing readers. I almost expected them to feature the Petticoat v 5.0, but I suppose that's an older model, from another show. (thanks, Casimir Nozkowski)

UK government kills Copyright Great Firewall, establishes user rights

The UK government has abandoned its plan to establish a copyright-based national firewall that media executives could use to block websites to which they objected. The proposal for a UK Great Firewall was part of the Digital Economy Act, but the expert reviews conducted by Professor Ian Hargreaves and the regulator Ofcom both advised against it. UK Business Secretary Vince Cable has, therefore, nixed the idea, which means that entertainment companies will actually have to win court injunctions ordering ISPs to block sites -- still scary, but at least there's some due process there.

Meanwhile Cable has also announced that the government will include a parody copyright exemption in our fair dealing laws (until now, it's been illegal to reproduce copyrighted works for parodical purpose), a relaxing of the rules on format-shifting, and a rights clearninghouse to make it easier to license works for lawful use. A rare moment of common sense in UK copyright policy!

UK Government Abandons File-Sharing Website Blocking Plans

How To: Make your science/Lady Gaga mashup better

Lady Gaga parody videos filmed in laboratory settings have become a hot meme among scientists. Want to make your own? Carin Bondar has some tips for quality video production.

NMA animates #NOTW: Murdoch having sex, pie attack, Lulzsec, Wendi Deng "tiger attack"

[Video Link]. This one, I personally requested of NMA.

The Majesty of Benny Hill

[Video link]

Yesterday I posted a demonstration of the raw power of a great sword. Someone in the comments requested that the video be Benny-Hillified, and now, thanks to reader zax I can share that with you.

From zax's description of the video:

Ever wanted to see a "portly" gentleman with an awesome tache chop up pigs with a two handed sword to the theme music from benny hill? Well here it is!!

"Go the Fuck to Sleep" audiobooks: Samuel L. Jackson and Werner Herzog editions

go-the-fuck-to-sleep.jpg

"All the kids from daycare are in dreamland. The froggie has made his last leap. Hell no you can't go to the bathroom, you know where you can go? The fuck to sleep."
Samuel L. Jackson voices this audiobook version of "Go The Fuck to Sleep," the previously-Boinged book which was officially published today (after crazy pre-release piracy).

The Samuel L. Jackson audiobook is free for the time being. Listen to a sample here.

You can also buy a hard copy or a Kindle version of the book now, just out today.

Word is that Werner Herzog will do an audiobook version, to be released soon:

Published today, the picture book begs sleepless children to "go the fuck to sleep" in a series of quaint, expletive-ridden verses. It soared to the top of book charts last month after a pirated PDF went viral, and calls this week from a New Zealand lobby group to ban it are only likely to add to its appeal.

"The flowers doze low in the meadows / And high on the mountains so steep. / My life is a failure, I'm a shitty-ass parent. / Stop fucking with me, please, and sleep," writes author and award-winning novelist Adam Mansbach, who was moved to pen the book when his own daughter was suffering sleepless nights. "The cubs and the lions are snoring, / Wrapped in a big snuggly heap. / How come you can do all this other great shit / But you can't lie the fuck down and sleep?"

Mansbach said that "the best possible person in the world" was narrating the audiobook: Herzog. The film director's recording will be unveiled at an event to launch the book, illustrated by Ricardo Cortes for small American publisher Akashic Books, at the New York Public Library.

Unofficial videos of Werner Herzog impersonators reading aloud various other children's books follow. Oh my god I can't even wrap my head around how awesome the real thing would be.

Read the rest

Bob Dylan sings about the video game "Gears of War." Bonus: "Goat Rap."

[Video Link]. Oh, alright: it's really internet video genius Liam Lynch. It's a clip from his podcast, "Lynchland:The Liam Lynch Podcast". Full episodes can be seen at liamlynch.net or on iTunes.

Here's the video that inspired this parody. Not into Dylan? Liam's "Goat Rap," below.

Read the rest

WATCHPONIES: Watchmen/My Little Pony mashup

[Video Link]
(via Rick Marshall)

RELATED: Did you know that "My Little Pony" has older, male fans that refer to themselves as "bronies"?

Each day, out-of-work computer programmer Luke Allen self-medicates by watching animated ponies have magical adventures. The 32-year-old, who lives in Albuquerque, New Mexico, loves his daily fix of My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic, and he's not alone. He's part of a growing group of "bronies" ("bro ponies") -- men who are fans of a TV show largely intended for a much younger audience.

"First we can't believe this show is so good, then we can't believe we've become fans for life, then we can't believe we're walking down the pink aisle at Toys R Us or asking for the girl's toy in our Happy Meal," Allen said in an e-mail to Wired.com. "Then we can't believe our friends haven't seen it yet, then we can't believe they're becoming bronies too."

Now you do.
(Wired News)

ColecoVision 1983 TV ad for George Plimpton's "Video Falconry" game

[Video Link, from NewGrounds via Jesse Thorn]

Chicken: Chicken chicken chicken chicken

Chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken! Chicken. Chicken chicken chicken—chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken chicken—chicken chicken chicken. Chicken chicken chicken, chicken chicken chicken chicken Chicken Chicken chicken.

Chicken chicken chicken chicken.

Chicken chicken.

(Chicken Chicken Chicken)

Star Wars-Osama Bin Laden-New York Times parody/mashup

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Galactic Empire Times.

(Via Dave Itzkoff)

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By pixelfucks.com. (thanks, Dean Putney, via Canv.as)