Park visitors required to sit up straight on benches in Orlando


Here's my second post today about parks in Florida: a sign in an Orlando park erected to refresh visitors' memory of the City Code forbidding them to "lie or otherwise be in a horizontal position on a park bench."

Tacky Fabulous points out, "Somebody must have tried the 'I wasn't laying down – I was just positioned horizontally' excuse."

I know – you're saying to yourself, "But wait a second! Didn't Orlando hover near record high rates for murders in the year 2007? Shouldn't there be a sign, instead, that reads: "Please do not impale with bullets or otherwise inflict death blows on other beings?" The answer is yes, but people who commit homicides tend to start as people who recline on park benches. It's textbook.

I also like the part prohibiting people from "remaining" in "bushes, shrubs, or foliage."