Snarky Amazon reviews for Denon's dumb-ass $500 Ethernet cable

Over on Boing Boing Gadgets, our Rob takes notice of the hilarious, scathing "reviews" left on the Amazon sell-page for Denon's $500 Ethernet cable which is supposed to deliver superior audio to your IP-based speakers:

"If I could use a rusty boxcutter to carve a new orifice in my body that's compatible with this link cable, I would already be doing it. I can just imagine the pure musical goodness that would flow through this cable into the wound and fill me completely — like white, holy light."

javascript:void(0) "A caution to people buying these: if you do not follow the 'directional markings' on the cables, your music will play backwards. Please check that before mentioning it in your reviews."

"The first time I downloaded a picture to the printer over this cable, the bits moved so fast the printer collapsed into a naked singularity, right there in my office."

"I accidentally dropped one end of my Denon cable into a glass of Tuscan whole milk I was drinking. Later when I finished my milk (yeah, I still drank it; should I not have done that?), my right arm (lost in an accident in 1987) spontaneously grew back. Is that normal?"