Did you know that Nokia has a "luxury" subsidiary that makes phones for stupid rich people?
As the European cellular industry's supernumerary nipple, Vertu has long specialized in calculator-display brickphones that look like dragon poo rolled in gemstones. It oozes along the dried slugtrail of progress, having just announced its first touchscreen Symbian handset--sure to be an LG Prada-killer!
In spite of its claim to be the "pinnacle of mobile phone excellence worldwide," the sad reality of Vertu's obsolete junk shows how alien the gadget business is to sellers of luxury. Technology's R&D-driven elements of quality and credibility are now so fast-changing as to be inaccessible to them. Even the most clueless class aspirant appreciates the power that new technology exerts over traditional tokens of extrinsic self-worth; it's better to just get a gold case for a standard-issue iPhone.
Though the company's future is uncertain--Nokia is reportedly trying to offload it--Vertu still understands the communication needs of oil wives and drug dealers better than anyone. Pictured above is the "Data Cable", featuring "High Speed USB 2.0", on offer for $190. With tax and shipping, that'll head well over $200 for a cable you can buy at monoprice for $2. Talk about charging what the market will bear!
Even a standard lithium-ion battery will set you back $90.
The V Collection Bluetooth Headset at least has the same unique, vaguely-80s design as the handsets themselves; but what could be more illustrative of the "invisible clothing" problem than its $790 price tag? Apart from the $1300 cases with names like "Signature Precious".
Lucian's SPUDwriter (Single Purpose User Device) was designed to help him focus on creative writing after a long day of staring at a screen in his engineering job: it uses an e-ink screen and a keyboard, and only outputs via SD card or thermal printer. As a person who does all of their engineering work […]
The Internet of Dongs is Brad Haines's term for the world of internet-connected, "teledildonic" sex toys, and Haines, along with Sarah Jamie Lewis, have exhaustively documented all the ways in which internet-connected sex toys can screw you, from leaking private data to physically attacking your junk.
The Right to Repair movement got state legislatures to consider more than a dozen Right to Repair bills last year, and have made great strides in the EU and elsewhere, but for every two steps forward they manage, they're forced a step or two back by giant corporate lobbyists, led by Apple, who want to […]
What do Facebook, Twitter, YouTube and Google all have in common? Somewhere in their framework, they all use MySQL, that most versatile (and free!) of database management systems. And they’re not alone. If your company or the one you’d like to work for wrangles data (and who doesn’t?), they’re going to need someone with a […]
There’s a reason you’re hearing about the gig economy in every other business story these days. More than ever, people are finding income from more than one source. And if you find the right one, a side hustle can do more than just pad your pockets – it can allow you to finally get paid […]
High-def cameras are available to anyone and for much less than they were just a decade ago. Even the phones in our pockets can be used to shoot and edit short films. It’s never been easier to be a filmmaker, providing you have the technique. Enter the Film & Cinematography Mastery Bundle, an online boot […]