Thanks for the box of worthless crap, Meh!

Boing Boing proudly welcomes our sponsor, Meh.

I was completely unprepared for how disappointed I was going to be with my random box of crap from Meh.

The folks at Meh told me I didn't have to like anything they sent. Dave told me over and over, it is ok if we hate the stuff. Having tried out most of what they sent me, I can safely say I was entertained, then frustrated, scared, confused, frustrated again, kinda bored and slightly angry. A box of crap indeed!

When I opened the cardboard box, I still thought maybe I'd get something really great. I didn't think this was impossible! I'd seen some items listed that I was sure would be a lot of fun to play with. Right on top, first thing out of the box was something I thought would be great: the CAP Clip-A-Phone!

This looked like a lot of fun! A SmartPhone mount for the brim of a baseball cap? What could go wrong? I grabbed an old hat, some hair clips and my Great Pyrenees. Amazing fun, right? I envisioned a hilarious Dog's Eye view of the world revealed through a camera clipped to my best friend's head. Luckily I didn't destroy my phone.

CAP turns your hat into an unbalanced weight dangling just above your face. There is no way a dog, even with lots of hair clips, and a bandana tied over his head holding it on, could walk with it on. Putting the hat on my 9 year old daughter allowed my phone to drop about 3 1/2 feet to the ground, luckily, the hat and clip protected it from taking the brunt of the fall. The same thing happened from 6 feet up when I tried it on. Unless you wear your hat uncomfortably tight, this clip seems designed to sell replacement screens and phones.

The one time I got the CAP to stick on my dog's head, the included bluetooth remote and app barely worked and I got no video anyways. We probably lost 90 minutes of our lives to this Clip.

I found a video from SkyMall to show off the quality of this "Pulse Massager" but I was completely unwilling to electrocute myself. It just looks creepy and honestly, I'd probably have to shave myself, or my cat, to have tried this on anything living. The big idea being you stick some electrodes to yourself and shock your muscles into submission.

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Kinda like the Clip-A-Phone, I thought this AwoX StriimLIGHT Bluetooth LED Speaker Light was going to let me have music in my bathroom. The AwoX StriimLIGHT should just screw into the socket like any other bulb. It doesn't. I'm pretty sure this'll only fit into a lamp with a lampshade, because the form factor is so weird I can not get the bulb to mate with the threads in any recessed socket, or some Restoration Hardware fixtures. I did test it in my living room, however it didn't hold a candle to my stereo.

I was only supposed to get 3 things to check out, but I'm guessing Dave wanted to make sure I was totally underwhelmed. They also included this WildSide blender. It is completely a blender. I guess if you need a blender it'd be pretty awesome, but I'm 44. I have a blender.

My box of worthless crap was as advertised. Crappy. It was a lot of fun to play with the stuff and try to make it work, and I certainly wouldn't have been one of the 1500 lucky purchasers of that "massager," but every now and then a deal comes up on Meh that I just can't resist.

--Jason