New Maine News [via Cat Valente] is that rare thing online: a local Onion-style satirical news site that is good. It's great! I feel almost like I live there.
From the front page alone:
• Over 80% of Maine Fathers’ Affection Is Directed at Their Wood Piles
• Heroic Man Saved Dying Pit Party by Cranking Some AC/DC
• This Innovative Chef Took the Traditional Maine Baked Bean Supper and Made it Cost $85
• Expert Panel Concludes Maine Didn’t Used to Be Like This.
Augusta — Experts presented their conclusion to a years-long study of how Maine is now, compared to how it once was, and the results are alarming.
“Weren’t like this back in the ’70s,” lead researched Brian Richards said in a prepared statement.
“Didn’t used to be like this at all. Terrible now. Don’t even hardly recognize it,” Richards said. Richards grew up in Thomaston, but has since moved north.
“Time was, if you had a few beers and a cop pulled you over, he’d just follow you to make sure you got home alright,” he said.
The US Senate has just voted in favor of REVERSING the #NetNeutrality rollback which Trump FCC chairman, Ajit Pai put in place. This is a major win for the internet, Net Neutrality, and the American people.
A 38-year-old Florida man was killed in his bedroom when his vape pen exploded and shot two pieces into his head. The explosion also burned 80 percent of his body and lit his house on fire.
The psyopsing worked. Gina Haspel now appears to have secured enough votes to be confirmed as director of the Central Intelligence Agency, after two additional Senate Democrats today announced they will vote for her.
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