Our long national NECCO nightmare may soon be over

Since 1847, non-discerning Americans have been eating slices of flavored chalk branded as NECCO wafers. With the company possibly closing soon, they're panic buying the inedible grim-tasting "candy" to torture one last round of guests or trick-or-treaters with their terrible taste in candy.

The same Puritans who dreamt up eels and corn as a side dish probably thought NECCO was delectable. Luckily, their totally realistic $20 million GoFundMe campaign appears to be doomed as well.

If you'd like to make your own NECCO once they close, here's the secret recipe:

• 1 lb. chalk (or drywall)
• 1 c. contents from vacuum cleaner bag
• 1 urinal cake
• 1 tbsp. nutmeg
• 1 tbsp. Windex
• 1 tbsp. theater floor scrapings

Mix together and press into thin wafers. Best if used in the first 150 years.

NECCO-Mania: Fans Stock Up On Chalky Wafers In Case Candy Company Folds

Image: Mike Mozart