Apparently, you are looking at the President's penis.
? ? ? The Guardian got a copy of Stormy Daniel's tell-all book about her affair with Donald Trump, not long before he became President. There's more than we want to know inside.
In 'Full Disclosure,' the porn star cum author says Trump's penis is "smaller than average" but "not freakishly small."
Good to know! Thanks for the nightmares.
"It may have been the least impressive sex I'd ever had, but clearly, he didn't share that opinion," Daniels writes in the book.
"He knows he has an unusual penis. It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool," she says.
From the Guardian's excerpt:
Trump's bodyguard invites Daniels to dinner, which turns out to be an invitation to Trump's penthouse, she writes, in a description of alleged events that Daniels has disclosed previously but which in the book are rendered with new and lurid detail. She describes Trump's penis as "smaller than average" but "not freakishly small."
"He knows he has an unusual penis," Daniels writes. "It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool…
"I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart…
"It may have been the least impressive sex I'd ever had, but clearly, he didn't share that opinion."
There's plenty more gems in 'Full Disclosure'. Do you like sharks? ? Television shows about sharks? ? This is good A+ content for you.
Daniels' alleged relationship with Trump included one moment in 2007, she writes, in which she is with Trump in a hotel room watching a Shark Week broadcast on cable television when he receives a phone call from Hillary Clinton, then running against Barack Obama for the Democratic presidential nomination.
"Then, to make it crazier, Hillary Clinton called," Daniels writes. "He had a whole conversation about the race, repeatedly mentioning 'our plan'…
"Even while he was on the phone with Hillary, his attention kept going back to the sharks."