"And not everyone is happy."
the controversial trend is back in the spotlight—and not in a good way. Penis facials are receiving a lot of backlash following a November 21st Instagram post by actress Kate Beckinsale, who captioned her photo, “After a long flight I do like to lie down and be covered in a mask of liquified cloned foreskins – frankly who doesn’t?”
Among the outlets elaborating on this story are People and The Guardian. The penis facial is $650, but there's a two-year waiting list. It is, essentially, minor outpatient surgery akin to a botoxing or chemical peel:
I’ll hate myself for this, but can you explain the foreskin facial? Of course! Epidermal growth factor (EGF) serum is derived from the progenitor cells of the human fibroblast taken from the foreskins of newborn babies.
And what does it do? Glad you asked. It helps to generate collagen and elastin, which can help to boost the radiance of your face. Fun sidenote: it also smells exactly like sperm!
Well, sign me up. Wait, there’s more. For the serum to take hold, a beauty therapist must first microneedle you.
I don’t know what that is. Oh, it’s fun. It’s where a pen containing dozens of tiny needles repeatedly stabs you in the face hundreds of thousands of times. It’s excruciatingly painful
Hyperreality refers to our inability to separate reality from simulation. This is a feature of postmodern life often associated with VR but baked deeply into our psychological relationship to media in general. Now, this seems like a great way to approach the issue of celebrities on instagram smearing themsleves in juiced baby cock flesh. But let me suggest an alternate frame of reference: Hell is empty and all the devils are here.
Last night I saw HBO’s The Inventor: Out for Blood in Silicon Valley about the rise and fall of Elizabeth Holmes and her company/cult, Theranos. It’s very good and surprisingly unsettling. UPDATE: I’ve looped her intensely unpleasant stare for 10 minutes and set it against a nice slow performance of Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. Enjoy the […]
The parking spot has “NO PARKING” and tow-warning signs, and is so notorious for enforcement that legitmate customers tell anyone parking their car there what is going to happen. This is all being filmed, from 60 angles, by people who have seen it happen many times before. Because they are the people who make it […]
Flushin’ Frenzy [Amazon] is a toy wherein you push a plunger until a poop pops up. All the fun of clearing out a blocked toilet! The game’s tagline is “Poop there it is!” Game night just got gross – in the best way! Flushin’ Frenzy makes being a plumber fun! Push the toilet handle to […]
If you’re into tech at all, you should definitely consider unleashing your inner tinkerer on a Raspberry Pi board. If you’re intimidated, don’t be. It’s a statistical probability that people half your age have created cooler things than you can imagine with the versatile kit. Not sure where to start? The Complete Raspberry Pi 3B+ […]
Are you super organized? You’re going to love the Genius Pack G4 and its seemingly limitless, well-placed compartments. Not that organized? You’re still going to love this piece of luggage because it’s so well thought out that it practically does the packing for you. We’ve all tried to stuff a piece of carry-on so full […]
Despite government legislation and improving caller ID technology, robocalls and scam artists are rampant on the phone lines – up to 35 billion a year in the US alone. They can be annoying at best and a financial threat at worst, but there’s a way to take security into your own hands. One good example […]