In response to Trump's recent mind-boggling tweet accusing an old man who was assaulted by police in Buffalo as being part of an elaborate Antifa sting operation (I hate that I had to even type that sentence), Washington Post opinion satirist Alexandra Petri has written some handy advice for identifying those radical septua-, octo-, and nonagenarian who may have secretly enlisted in a non-hierarchical autonomous legion of non-identifying membership relating to anti-fascist activism:
For your birthday, she knits you an unwanted scarf. To be used as a balaclava?
She belongs to a decentralized group with no leadership structure that claims to be discussing a "book," but no one ever reads the book and all they seem to do is drink wine.
Is always talking on the phone with an "aunt" you have never actually met in person. Aunt TIFA????
Always walking into rooms and claiming not to know why he walked into the room. Likely.
He "trips" over and breaks your child's Lego police station when walking through the living room in the dark.
I'm only slightly disappointed that the punchline here is not "Your grandparents probably literally fought fascists in World War II."
Know The Signs: How to tell if your grandparent has become an antifa agent [Alexandra Petri / Washington Post]
Image: Jessica Merz / Flickr (CC 2.0)