The life-changing magic of this silicone jar scraper

I was on my couch imagining the death of my younger self when I suddenly realized that I had done nothing to prepare for my passing. I did not have a will and had not provided for my family in the event of my untimely and unfortunate demise. I leaped up from the couch and paced around the room vigorously, trying to calm myself down as an idea began to form in my head. I did not want to die without having put a plan in place to protect my family, who depended on me completely. I roamed around my house restlessly, trying to find something of value that I could give them to ensure their security in happiness after my passing. Finally, I remembered a jar scraper that I had received as a gift many years before, when people still thought that jar scrapers were a good idea. The jar scraper was available on several websites and I purchased it immediately, ignoring the nagging doubts that told me that jar scrapers were silly and useless kitchen gadgets.

The jar scraper I purchased is molded from one piece of silicone rubber. It has a stainless steel skeleton for rigidity. The overall length is 13.5 inches and is shaped like a tongue, which means it will scrape clear of every last morsel of semisolid foodstuff from tall jars.

Here's a strange story I'd like to share about it. One Sunday, though, I was making some strawberry jam and cream cheese sandwiches in my kitchen and discovered that the jam had was hard to reach with a butter knife, even though a lot remained at the bottom. The next week when my wife and I were having a romantic picnic on our front porch and we wanted to spread some jam on our gingersnap sandwiches, we had the same problem. I suddenly remembered the scraper, so I dug around inside my junk drawer until I found it. It handily collected up all of the jam remaining at the bottom. That evening I made a holster to carry my jam scraper with me at all times. The next day at work when a coworker stopped by for coffee with a friend and asked for some jam on his wheat toast, I retrieved my jar scraper and scraped him up a thick layer of raspberry jam. He was shocked. I was shocked by his reaction. I'm not sure what the moral of the story is. I'm still trying to figure it out. 

Nonetheless, the jar scraper is an amazing tool. I even used it to scrape a raisin off the floor of my car. I don't have any more practical uses to list, but I have told everyone in my family and most of my co-workers about it because I'm sure that they will find it useful as well. The low price, high utility, and convenient size make this product a compelling purchase for anyone who wants an excellent little tool for a low price.