A Catholic priest in Arizona has resigned after he was found to have performed baptisms incorrectly throughout his career, rendering the rite invalid for thousands of people.
The Catholic Diocese of Phoenix announced on its website that it determined after careful study that the Rev. Andres Arango had used the wrong wording in baptisms performed up until June 17, 2021. He had been off by a single word.
During baptisms in both English and Spanish, Arango used the phrase "we baptize you in the Name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." He should have said "I baptize," the diocese explained.
I can't help laughing at the visual of one of those poor Arizonans showing up at the Pearly Gates, getting all antsy while St. Peter looks through his book. "Sorry, I don't see your name on the list," he says.
"Maybe they spelled my name wrong? It's —"
St. Peter glowers through the glasses on the bridge of his nose. "God does not clerical errors. Next!"
Meanwhile, God's up in his office, shaking his head, still pissed at the guy who failed to respect his pronouns.
An Arizona priest used one wrong word in baptisms for decades. They're all invalid [Rachel Treisman / NPR]
Image: Nek Vardikos / Wikimedia Commons (CC-BY-SA 3.0)