Turns out, the mystery of Sumerian "handbags" is no mystery at all

If you've spent any time bushwhacking the thorny thickets of Graham Hancock-y ancient apocalypse flapdoodle, you've likely encountered the great handbag mystery. Sure as sure, carved images of gods, wise ones, kings, and emissaries from the Dog Star, in many corners of the world, seem to depict entities carrying handbags (some of them damn-fine looking bags). This is often presented as evidence of a link between these various ancient cultures and tied to the idea of a former advanced civilization visiting all of them (for some inexplicable reason).

Turns out, at least in the Sumerian case, they're not bags at all. They're buckets, probably being used to water a sacred tree. They're actually identified as buckets in Sumerian texts and there are even surviving examples of such buckets that look exactly like the ones in the images. So, no mystery at all.

Now explain the wrist watches. Wake up, Sheeple!