Here's another installment in my series, "Is this company punking us?"
Look, I'm all for clothing with cute ears that makes you feel like you're part (non-human) animal when you wear it. I used to have a black hoodie that was adorned with multicolored fabric "dinosaur spikes." I was bummed when it shrank too small to wear. Heck, if I had an extra $250, I'd even commit fully and buy one of these animal onesies from Blamo—they have bunnies and unicorns and monkeys and wolves and bats and foxes and more. I think they're adorable!
But I think I draw the line at this hoodie being sold by Charmin, the toilet paper company, for $29.99. It's a white hoodie, with a pocket in the front, little ears on the hood, and a graphic of one of the bears from the Charmin commercials (the ones that used to live in a forest and used Charmin to wipe their poop but who now inexplicably live in a house and use toilets), along with the slogan "Own the Throne." I know the company is just punking us, and the folks who buy it (and leave reviews) are doing so with a great deal of irony, but still, why does life have to be like this? One review posted on the Charmin twitter page reads:
5 stars. OMG this is actually amazing. I spend minimum up to 140 minutes a day on the toilet to just be able to wear this for that time while I'm on the toilet is such a great feeling such a soft hoodie and I love the little ears. It makes me feel like one of the bears in the commercials. –Mr. SaddleBackMoneyStacks
I'm with the person who commented on the ad I saw for the hoodie on Facebook who said, "That's too much dedication for over-priced toilet paper lmfao." And it made me laugh when one commenter asked, "Is it made out of Charmin toilet paper?" The company responded: "Wouldn't that be something, Alex? That would truly make it multipurpose, butt no, it's 80% cotton, 20% polyester. 😊 If you have any further questions, roll em' on over!" I'm sure the misspelling of "but" was intentional. Sigh.
I won't be buying the sweatshirt, but I will be watching this video, created by YouTuber GregCubed, that provides a funny critique of the Charmin bear ads, which debuted in 2001 and that, in his words, feature a family of bears who are "obsessed with pooping."