Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes finally heads to prison today

Elizabeth Holmes, the Theranos founder who took billions from investors on the promise of blood-analyzing technology that didn't work, will finally begin serving her 11-year prison sentence today. Holmes once declared that they "don't put pretty people like me in jail" and fortified that assumption in ruthless fashion before and during her trial.

Lawyers for Holmes attempted to delay the start of her prison sentence by asking that she remain free while she appeals her conviction, but the Ninth Circuit of Appeals denied her request, ruling that Holmes has not raised a "substantial question" of law or fact about her case. … It is unclear how long Holmes will be at the prison camp in Bryan, Texas, but The Wall Street Journal reportsthat many inmates are released early from the facility for good conduct and participation in prison programs, including training Labrador puppies for work as service dogs, or working in the facility's kitchen, which pays 12 cents an hour.

The children she had in hopes of keeping herself out of prison will be able to visit her on the weekends and "will be able to sit on her lap." Even a fawning profile from the magically gullible New York Times couldn't save her.