South Dakota Governor warns of America's impending doom, blames Target

America had a good run. It survived a civil war, two world wars, a great depression, and McCarthyism. But all good things come to an end. Kristi Noem, South Dakota's very stable genius governor, told Fox News that America is doomed unless everyone stops shopping at Target:

It's dangerous. And Steve, I'll tell you I'm like a lot of Americans. Love to shop at Target. I mean, we do, but we just can't anymore. And while the rest of the country is worried about, you know, having fun and going out and shopping and enjoying a store, that store is fundamentally tearing down this country, and we have to have real conversations about how serious we are about protecting our freedom.

Noem doesn't say what the "real conversations" are about or what getting "serious" about "protecting our freedom" entails, but it's not hard to guess it doesn't include the freedom to shop at Target.