Fox Business viewers rush to buy $2 bill with Trump's mugshot for $20

Move over, Benjamin Franklin! There's a new face gracing our currency, and it's straight from the Fulton County Jail.

This commercial that's airing on Fox Business (and posted on Xitter by Aaron Rupar), is oozing with patriotic fervor. The narrator excitedly proclaims, "Donald J. Trump makes history once again by becoming the first former president of the United States to ever be criminally indicted." Wow, what an achievement! That's exactly what the founding fathers dreamed of when they created the office.

But wait! There's more! The ad goes on to describe this masterpiece of numismatic artistry: "National Collectors Mint has taken crisp uncirculated US legal tender $2 bills direct from sealed treasury packs, then enhanced them to commemorate this event… The mugshot seen around the world is front and center in the portrait oval flanked by images of the flag and President Trump's famous signature. His inmate number is inscribed below the photo and his declaration, 'never surrender,' is boldly presented on the bill." Never mind the fact that Trump literally surrendered to the authorities to have his mugshot taken. In the world of MAGA, the truth must wait in line behind blind loyalty, willful ignorance, and the eagerness to inflict self harm if it causes more suffering to people who don't look like their tribe members.

Now, you might be thinking, "Surely such a treasure must cost a fortune!" Fear not, budget-conscious patriots! The ad assures us, "The final issue price was to be set at $39. However, during this special release, this full-color commemorative $2 bill can be yours for only $19.95." It's like they're practically giving away money… or, you know, the exact opposite of that. Remember, "First come, first served. So earliest orders receive priority over later ones." Hurry, before the libtards catch wind of this special offer and use their welfare checks to buy them all up.

But wait again, there's even more! National Collectors Mint is limiting sales to just five bills per caller. Fox Business' financially savvy viewers will have to move fast for the chance to trade 100 dollars for 10 dollars.

In the immortal words of the commercial, "Avoid disappointment and future regret. Call now." Because if there's one thing that'll stave off regret it paying ten times the face value for a colorized $2 bill featuring a disgraced former president's mugshot.

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