I must admit — I'm not 100% sure these were ever actual headlines somewhere. They were collected on this US government website, plainlanguage.gov, so… maybe? But real or not, language fails always make me laugh and these are some pretty funny fails.
- Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
- Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
- Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
- Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax
- Farmer Bill Dies in House
- British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
- Teacher Strikes Idle Kids
- Miners Refuse to Work after Death
- Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
- War Dims Hope for Peace
- If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
- Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
- Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
- Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
- Man Struck By Lightning Faces Battery Charge
- New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
- Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
- Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
- Chef Throws His Heart into Helping Feed Needy
- Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
- Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
- Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
The mission of plainlanguage.gov is kinda great. They claim:
The Plain Language Action and Information Network (PLAIN) is a community of federal employees dedicated to the idea that citizens deserve clear communication from government. We believe that using plain language saves federal agencies time and money and provides better service to the American public.
Plain language makes it easier for the public to read, understand, and use government communications.
I'm not sure if they've made a dent in the absurd language of the bureaucracy, but I commend the effort. Maybe they can get corporate America to sign up for one of their seminars.
Previously:
• Can you spot the real New York Times headline?
• Sensationalist London newspaper headline
• Headline fail: Kansas students get 'first hand job experience'
