Yesterday, the Minecraft movie trailer emerged to howls of complaint from… adults. People like me:
It's going to be a "real people transported to the Game World" dealie and looks like one of those fancy shader packs that lipsticks the aesthetic so your video card has something to do. Everyone in it looks vaguely disgusted by it. … I'm just glad Jason Momoa has something to do for the next 20 years that aren't increasingly weird, horny Dune sequels. … [it is suggested that Jack-Steve is Notch] … I already want to do a remix trailer that's about Notch being Tronned into his game with the suggestion of an extremely bleak ending that then has an even bleaker twist, like he's actually just been alone in his mansion and this is his final dream at the threshold of death. You think it's Jorge Borges' Minecraft, el Último Laberinto, but, haha, it's Ted Chiang's Minecraft.
Then it registered that my boy had watched the trailer five times while I was writering. He was embarking on a sixth. He spent the rest of the day quoting it. "Quoting" uncanny devoxelated square livestock. Muttering about it in his sleep. The Minecraft movie is not for us. It is for them. John Walker:
There's a generation that feels like Minecraft belongs to them. They were in there ahead of the crowds, loving the game before it even officially launched in 2011, and certainly before it became one of the biggest franchises in the world and Microsoft bought it for $2.5 billion.
But even that colossal sale was ten years ago. For ten years, Minecraft has been one of the top-grossing media franchises, more likely to be seen on clothing in Walmart than on the news feed of your favorite gaming site. Minecraft has multiple physical magazines, both official and unofficial, and I hope you're not shocked to learn they're aimed at elementary school kids. There's an interactive cartoon on Netflix, and…it's for children. Visit any toy store and there will be shelves and shelves and shelves of tie-in plastic figures, swords, Steve heads, Creeper plushies, enormous Ender Dragon toys, Lego kits, and on and on.
Ask anyone with a child under 12 what their kids' favorite game is, and it's a coinflip if they'll say Fortnite or Minecraft.
They aren't going to "Ugly Sonic" this one. Deal with it, millennials!
Sorry, The Minecraft Movie Isn't Meant To Be For You [Kotaku]
