Senator Marco Rubio from Florida is quite the character. Back in the 2016 Republican presidential debates, Trump kept calling him "Little Marco," poking fun at his height. He said Rubio had "really large ears, the biggest ears I've ever seen." On Twitter, Trump called him a "lightweight chocker" (misspelling "choker").
Rubio took the bait like a starving rat. "He's always calling me Little Marco. And I'll admit he's taller than me," he said. "He's like 6'2, which is why I don't understand why his hands are the size of someone who is 5'2." And you know what they say about men with small hands? You can't trust them."
This just gave Trump a chance to talk about one of his favorite subjects — the size of people's penises: "Look at those hands, are they small hands? And he referred to my hands – 'if they're small, something else must be small.' I guarantee you there's no problem. I guarantee."
Not long after that, Rubio dropped out of the race and split his time between sanctimoniously posting scripture on Xitter and licking Trump's shoes with enthusiastic vigor at every opportunity.
Eight years later, as you can see in this cringe interview with Anderson Cooper, Senator Smolpeen is still lick lick licking away.
Anderson Cooper
Are you concerned about some of the tangents [Trump's] been going off on the last couple of days?Marco Rubio
[Derisive huffaw] Well, this is a guy that's been commonly compared to Adolf Hitler. This is a person whose supporters have been called subhuman garbage and worse compared to Nazis by major media outlets.Anderson Cooper
You used to call him a fraud. So, I mean, the language has been out that way for a long time.Marco Rubio
[Indignantly] People we're running campaigns! Let me tell you something. After you call somebody Adolf Hitler, there's really nowhere else to go. That's probably the worst thing you could label anybody.Anderson Cooper
That was his vice president who called him Adolf Hitler.Marco Rubio
No, no, no, no. That was not. That was the major outlets in this country on the eve of an election comparing his rallies to Nazi rallies, putting up imagery. No, Anderson, you know what it is to put up imagery. Maybe it wasn't your network, although I can point to things in your network, that basically just label anything he says as violent rhetoric, including jokes, including things that are clearly off the cuff. But he has a unique communication style, and he's not going to change the day before. But this is a guy that's been subjected to relentless and ruthless attacks against this character, against everything you can imagine. Yeah, he's going to punch back. There's no doubt about it. That's going to happen. So, to argue that in the last 24 hours, Kamala Harris hasn't mentioned his name. After you've got Oprah Winfrey last night, I don't really care. Look, celebrities can endorse whoever they want. But last night, she said something at a rally about, "if you don't vote today, you may never get a chance to vote again." Really? I mean, come on. This is silly stuff. Yeah, there's going to be some punch back.Anderson Cooper
You do know that your candidate has been saying that for weeks now about "it's the end of America, it's the last election." I mean, this is the rhetoric he's been using. I get it. You say Oprah said it. I mean, and it was JD Vance who called him America's Hitler.Marco Rubio
Well, JD Vance has already addressed that.
You'd think by this time Little Marco's tongue would be raw. But it's a small price to pay to not have the orange bully say mean things about you again.
Previously on Boing Boing: