So you've been scratching your head raw wondering why Trump keeps lobbing tariff bombs at our economy? Mystery solved!
Bloomberg reports that while Trump's trade war is turning the dollar into bird cage liner, Russia's ruble has surged 38% to become the world's strongest currency. Even gold – that shiny security blanket of apocalypse preppers everywhere – can't keep up with Putin's paper.
Every time Trump tweets another tariff threat, the dollar drops. Meanwhile, Moscow's money managers are dancing the kalinka all the way to their state-controlled banks.
International investors, demonstrating all the ethical discrimination of vultures at an all-you-can-eat roadkill buffet, are now routing their money through "friendly" countries to get those sweet 21% Russian interest rates.
This financial farce is exactly what Putin ordered when he decided to back his favorite failed casino operator for president.
Who knew destroying American financial dominance could be as simple as installing a chaos agent with the economic understanding of a concussed goldfish?
Previously:
• Putin-puppet Musk calls Sen. Mark Kelly 'traitor' for standing with allies — gets schooled in return
