America's Favorite Spray-Tanned Snowflake is having a very bad polls day, and he's handling it exactly how you'd expect — with denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and ALL CAPS TRUTH SOCIAL POSTS.
As reported in Rolling Stone, Trump took to Truth Social to demand — and I'm quoting verbatim here — that pollsters are "criminals" and "should be investigated for ELECTION FRAUD," because their numbers hurt his feelings.
Multiple polls show His Orange Majesty hovering around 39% approval.
"They are Negative Criminals who apologize to their subscribers and readers after I WIN ELECTIONS BIG, much bigger than their polls showed I would win, loose a lot of credibility, and then go on cheating and lying for the next cycle, only worse," Trump wrote. "They suffer from Trump Derangement Syndrome, and there is nothing that anyone, or anything, can do about it. THEY ARE SICK, almost only write negative stories about me no matter how well I am doing (99.9% at the Border, BEST NUMBER EVER!), AND ARE TRULY THE ENEMY OF THE PEOPLE!"
Remember kids, when the numbers don't go your way, just scream "FAKE NEWS" until the mean statistics go away. Works every time, 39% of the time.
Previously:
• Polls reveal Republicans want Musk out of politics
