The world's richest try-hard wants you to know Trump "actually calls, like late at night" to make sure he gets his special ice cream. As USA Today reports, Musk spent an hour sharing cool-kid-table stories about his White House sleepovers.
"We'll be on Air Force One, and Marine One, and he'll be like, 'Do you want to stay over?' And I'm like, 'sure,'" Musk simpered in the surreal and often tedious interview. "He'll actually call, like late at night, and say, like, 'Oh, by the way, make sure you get some ice cream from the kitchen.'"
The tone-deaf attention-seeker also made sure everyone knew his job is "60% fun, 70% fun," depending "on the week." He even bragged about his tiny office with "a view of nothing" and his super cool gaming setup. Maybe all those federal workers he fired would still have their jobs if they'd just spent their days playing Diablo instead of processing veterans' benefits and wasting time on food safety inspections.
When asked about scaling back his role while Tesla implodes, Musk showed off his inner Zen-bro: "Is Buddha needed for Buddhism?"
He followed up by giggling about DOGE's existence: "Are we in a simulation here, or what's going on?"
Buddy, any simulation that has you this rich, this cringe, and this thirsty for Trump's attention needs to be turned off and on again.
Previously:
• Musk takes break from ruining America to mock blind person
• Musk calls pilot the R-word over astronaut delay — then delays SpaceX flight to ISS
• Musk Watch tracker reveals DOGE savings overstated by 92%
