It was a long time coming, but former FIFA president Sepp Blatter (I always imagine Daffy Duck saying his name) has been indicted for fraud, stemming from a $2 million payment from 20 years ago. Also charged: former UEFA president Michel Platini. — Read the rest

As Swiss police once again raid the comically-corrupt international Soccer organiation FIFA, its disgraced and banned former president, Sepp Blatter, is to join a panel to discuss how it could be reformed.

Blatter will appear with former Chief Prosecutor of the International Criminal Court Luis Moreno Ocampo at the University of Basel on April 15th for a discussion on how FIFA can transition through its current crisis.

Hilariously corrupt soccer governing body FIFA has finally made a scapegoat of suspended president Sepp Blatter, banning him from the organization for 8 years. He is defiant, reports CNN, demanding to know what he was banned for.

It's for all the corruption, silly! — Read the rest

Ole Vlad's figured out how to troll the west: celebrate corrupt, populist strongmen who brazenly lie while fronting for the rich and powerful.

FIFA, the comically corrupt governing body of international soccer, has suffered hard times of late: several executives were collared by the law, it became apparent that World Cup hosting rights floated on a sea of bribery, and an expensively-financed biopic of glorious leader Sepp Blatter bombed at the box office.

No one expects a shower of fake bank notes.

The Associated Press is reporting that Sepp Blatter, the resigning president of splendidly corrupt soccer governing body FIFA, has "started work on reforming FIFA amid corruption crisis."

After winning a fifth term as FIFA president last week, Sepp Blatter has nonetheless resigned amid mounting pressure on soccer's astoundingly corrupt governing body.

Blatter has resigned. Can't quite believe it. FIFA always appeared to be such a fine upstanding organisation.

There's something wonderful in the sententious pomp of soccer ruling body FIFA's elections, contrasted against a reputation for corruption brought to new grossness by this week's indictment of officials by the U.S. Justice Department and Swiss cops.

The latest: elections will go to an exciting second round after a challenger, Prince Ali Bin al-Hussein, managed to gain enough votes to prevent Blatter getting two-thirds of the total, the necessary threshold for a quick win. — Read the rest

Spanish soccer league LaLiga broke a large portion of the Spanish internet because some naughty websites were letting 400,000 monthly viewers watch men chase balls around without paying the proper viewing tax to their corporate overlords.

LaLiga's Chief Internet Breaking Officer sprang into action and convinced Spanish ISPs to block these sites' IP addresses, conveniently forgetting to mention these addresses were shared by approximately eleventy billion other legitimate websites. — Read the rest

In the runup to the 1988 Olympics, the South Korean government ordered Seoul's "vagrants" to be cleared from the street. Thousands of people, many of them small children, were sent to a "welfare facility" called "Brothers Home," where they were subject to vicious, often fatal beatings and routine rape. — Read the rest

Brian Sacks: "Tell your child that before he/she was born you too had a groundbreaking idea for a rainbow-powered washing machine. Let them know you were on the verge of getting a patent and becoming fabulously wealthy but then they happened."

The Tim Roth-starring biopic of Sepp Blatter, president of comically corrupt soccer body FIFA, is shrouded in mystery. Partly, this is because no-one's watched it. But the movie, funded largely by FIFA itself, has done so badly that final numbers are hard to come by. — Read the rest

Hilariously and horrifically corrupt, FIFA could at least look forward to new leadership following president Sepp Blatter's resignation. Or, maybe not.

A perfectly-timed movie, presenting FIFA president Sepp Blatter as a valorous anticorruption crusader, has raked in $607—six hundred and seven dollars—at theaters in America.

The movie, United Passions, cost about $29,000,000 to make, with most of the financing provided by FIFA itself. — Read the rest

Six top executives of international football's (notoriously corrupt) governing body were arrested at the crack of dawn in their Zurich hotel by Swiss police acting on a US criminal corruption warrant.