Indiscriminate squid sperm distribution is not "bisexual"

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33 Responses to “Indiscriminate squid sperm distribution is not "bisexual"”

  1. Calvin Winter says:

    I think this is really for the squid to decide for themselves ;-)

  2. Guest says:

    it’s not bisexual, but it’s * probably at least a misdemeanor in most juridictions.

    * – Indiscriminate squid sperm distribution

  3. Jazz Baleña says:

    give the squids a break.

  4. Oliver Crosby says:

    Part of their can’t ask, can’t tell policy.

  5. robuluz says:

    How am I supposed to understand this behaviour if science communicators won’t dumb it down and anthropomorphise it for me? Can we at least settle on bukakke?

  6. This explains why Tucker Carlson thinks that guys are hitting on him in public toilets. They’re not gay they just feel like spewing on a dweeb. Doesn’t matter if he’s gay or not either.

  7. Is possible that some squids are more easily excited than others? Maybe they’re on a squid first date.

  8. Stay_Sane_Inside_Insanity says:

    Oh, and I suppose now you’re going to tell me that trees in the spring AREN’T trying to mate with me by covering me with pollen.  “It’s just indiscriminate fertilization.” 

    Way to ruin everything, science. 

  9. Mister44 says:

    IIRC, teenagers spend a good deal of time flinging their “packets” at anything that moves.

  10. Chuck Holt says:

    Alright.  Noted.

    But the guys who use the “it’s not gay when I do it, because” speech will probably point to Myers’ article as proof that they’re “normal.”

  11. dX says:

    I googled his name to find his twitter, and found my way to this:
    http://www.conservapedia.com/Evolutionists_who_have_had_problems_with_being_overweight_and/or_obese

    Did they just call him fat? Surely that article belongs in Uncyclopedia?

    • voiceinthedistance says:

      I had to double check that your link was not connected with The Onion, dX.  Surreal.

    • DewiMorgan says:

      conservapedia is… not a reliable source.

      I mean, 4chan, the onion, and uncyclopedia are not reliable sources, but only conservapedia takes ellipses to say that. Most other bonkers website are bonkers because it’s funny. Conservapedia is… bonkers because they are terrified. Of everything.

  12. purebredpro says:

    Sounds more like by-sexual.

  13. BarBarSeven says:

    Indiscriminate squid sperm distribution, I know, I know, it’s serious…

  14. Rah El says:

    Just another name for Bukakke, if you ask me.

  15. Flugelmeister says:

    Squid orgy… Squidgy???

  16. Graysmith says:

    Sounds simply like a case of getting caught in the crossfire.

  17. efergus3 says:

    “I STILL always entrust MY sperm packages to Fed Ex!”

  18. Rebecca DeLaTorre says:

    “All of the individuals in a colony simultaneously spew eggs and sperm into the water, to the degree that they can turn the ocean milky white with semen and ova.”

    Since I live in a beach area can some give me a heads up as to when this happens and where so I can avoid the shore during sperm and ova-slinging season?

  19. Deidzoeb says:

    Would indiscriminate sperm distribution among humans have evolutionary advantages? A person would not be targeting females with genetic qualities that seemed best to continue forward, or avoiding females with genetic problems, but we don’t necessarily do that anyways except on some instinctive levels. In terms of spreading one’s own DNA, it would make sense to make babies everywhere possible. On the other hand, ejaculating indiscriminately on males would be wasteful in terms of energy, or the limited number of times per day you could spread your sperm to someone. It would make sense to at least identify females first, and then distribute indiscriminately, if that’s what you’re hoping for.

    Let me know when there starts to be a fee associated with participating in these comments, because it’s starting to get me really hot.

  20. mypalmike says:

    “Is it even right to refer to it as an “orgy”? It’s just indiscriminate fertilization.”

    You say tomay-to, I say tomah-to.
    (but only when I’m visiting the UK)

  21. firefly the great says:

    Indiscriminate Squid Sperm would be a great band name.

  22. efergus3 says:

    Sort of like paintballin’.

  23. Guest says:

    It’s no wonder they are masters of camouflage.

  24. swlabr says:

    Well, if those squids ain’t queer, they sure ain’t hetero-normative either.

  25. Ted Bautista says:

    “…simultaneously spew eggs and sperm into the water, to the degree that they can turn the ocean milky white with semen and ova. ”

    dare we call it a santorum?

  26. cdh1971 says:

    You know your problem is Sponge Bob that you are hung up on words, on labels, that you believe they mean what they seem to mean. 

    I am not a ‘bisexual.’ I have sex with males. A ‘bisexual’ is someone who can’t get a Calamari on the phone.

    Bisexuals are males who know nobody and who nobody knows, who have zero clout. Does this sound like me Sponge Bob? No. I have clout. Lots. … I don’t want you to be impressed. I want you to understand.

  27. hostile_17 says:

    “indiscriminate fertilisation” is what they call a night out in Hemel Hempstead.

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