The Modern Humorist's glossary of alternate definitions for the Potterjargon that today's kooky kids can't stop spouting.
Quidditch: A hole in the ground in which to put your quid.
You-Know-Who: You know who it is. Don't kid yourself. It's Warwick Davis, diminutive star of "Willow" and "Leprechaun"!
Azkaban: Country that borders Pakistan and Uzbekistan.
Hufflepuff: Star of the classic Sid and Marty Krofft show "H.R. Hufflepuff." Still loved by Gen-Xers who assume that the name is a reference to "huffing" inhalants.
