God here. I thought I would take the time to personally explain my absence in the Aurora shootings. While I was at it, I thought I would also explain my absence during every murder, massacre and crime that has ever taken place in World history, and in every war, in every famine, drought and flood.
You see, I do not exist. I never have. Did it really make sense to you that I would create an entire Universe with billions of billions of planets and wait about 13,700,000,000 years just so I could focus on a few Jews from Palestine about 2,000 years ago while ignoring the rest of the 200,000,000 people on the planet at the time?
- Comment on a CNN Belief Blog editorial explaining "Where God was" during the recent shooting at a Dark Knight screening in Colorado.
Residents of Magangué, Colombia recently broke the compulsory quarantine to visit Jesus Christ who was hanging out in a tree. Praise be to pareidolia. From a El Tiempo via Google Translate: “It looks clear and everyone is praying to him and asking him to cure the land of this evil and to protect Magangué,” says […]
Archaeologists from the Israel Museum and colleagues found residue of cannabis containing THC on an altar in the ancient Israelite temple of Tel Arad. Apparently, the discovery in this 2,700-year-old temple south of Tel Aviv, Israel, is the first proof that ancient Jews used weed in rituals. From the BBC News: Researchers concluded that cannabis […]
An unidentified priest in Italy didn’t let the coronavirus situation stop him from doing mass. He simply live-streamed the service instead. Amusingly though, he left on his camera’s filters which overlayed a space helmet, some glitter, dumbbells (?), and a Walter White hat and sunglasses get-up onto his otherwise serious broadcast. Twitter user Gavin Shoebridge […]
Right tool for the right job. You probably heard a parent or grandparent say it at least once at some point. And it’s true in so many cases. If you spot a small tear in your living room curtains or near to hem a pair of pants, you can always use the good old fashioned […]
The world is holding its collective breath. As states begin cautiously reopening, no one is sure exactly what to expect. But one thing is clear: most Americans are worried about their bank accounts. By the end of March, the average American household was spending 40 percent less on their credit cards than they were one […]
Over 25 years, eBay has carved out its space as the commerce hub of choice online. With 182 million users worldwide, that works out to about 35 percent of all US mobile users who shop those eBay storefronts. But did you know there are usually around 1.3 billion — with a B — active for-sale […]