By David Pescovitz at 10:41 am Tue, Dec 23, 2008
“both twins use threats, hyperbole, and disinformation to terrorize gullible citizens…” which is completely unlike God’s threats, hyperbole, and disinformation.
Clearly Santa is an un-American evil Marxist who encourages people to go against their rational self interest. Giving freely to others without making a buck is a cancer on our economy. When oh when will we be free of this Liberal fascist and his gay commie elves?
“Evil Twins” is kind of a new one though. Normally there is only one evil twin. At least as far as the story telling device goes. I don’t know about real twins.
Before reading the post, just seeing the card, I thought this was a Jack Chick publication.
It’s bad when you can’t tell the satire from the real thing anymore.
I’ve been pointing out the similarities between the two years ago. They left out spreading greed throughout the land, the making of pacts, and contributing to the prevelence of occult beliefs, amongst others.
A really determined christian zealot could have a lot of fun with this. Of course, a satanist could just say “see? satan’s not that bad.”
Eric D @3, actually, I have a friend with whom I have a mutual evil twin relationship, meaning each of us is the other’s evil twin.
“for crimes against Christianity, rationality, honesty and good taste”, eh?
But, but, the enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?
Sorry, cheap shot, but it called out to me.
My all-time favorite joke:
What did the dyslexic devil-worshipper do?
He built a shrine to Santa.
i b’lieve his wife was a dyslexic agnostic who doubted the existence of Dog.
ahahahahahahahaaha. This is the funniest thing I saw all day today.
Let’s see…”Santa”, in Latin, is a female saint. Yes? Not only is Santa the evil twin of Satan, she’s the fraternal twin of Satan who cross-dresses. Or maybe she’s just a bearded lady. We all know how evil cross dressing bearded ladies are.
Excellent post, danke!
I think the fellow that wrote the “Santa Clause: The Great Impostor” needs to get on some medication. I can’t believe I read the whole thing. I was disturbingly fascinating to see the lateral connections he made while quoting KISS, Ozzy and some really lame books.
Satan and Santa Claus do share a common mythological ancestor.
That would be Puck, the woodland elf that puts coal in people’s stockings, is fond of milk, and is able to know everything underneath the moon. And his laugh is “Ho ho ho!”
Puck, in his other names, is synonymous with the Devil.
Ah the many faces of the old pagan.
Still laughing with a twinkle in his eyes.
Even in disguise.
Many year ago National lampoon had a single page cartoon that turned Santa into an L-Ron creature known as Santatology. Best send-up of St. Nick and the ohm meter religion on record.
A few years back I dressed as Satan Clause for Halloween. Red sweatsuit, Santa hat with devil horns, a pitchfork, and a black cape with “HAIL SANTA” written on it in white tape. Turned out to be less funny in practice than as a concept, but it came together in 20 minutes using a lot of staples, so I ran with it.
I was listening to the radio a few weeks ago, where the presenters were desperately trying to reassure small children that, despite what some person had claimed, Santa Claus did exist. All of the presenters and a few guests chipped in, to re-assert – categorically – that Santa DID exist and was real.
It occurred to me they’d never do that for Jesus, or God, if some athiest blurted out their ‘sacreligious’ opinion – that’s fine! – fuck Jesus! fuck God! – who cares if the little children don’t believe in them!
– just don’t dare challenge the false god of seasonal capitalism!
The first thing this reminded me of was SNL’s Dana Carvey’s Church Lady sketch from 1987 – I couldn’t find a video (stupid NBC) but here’s a transcript:
I am sure that Gary Larson approves of the art too.
@ #14: Satan and Santa Claus do share a common mythological ancestor.
In the Alpine regions of Europe, he’s known as Krampus.
And as far as the origins of Father Christmas & Krampus, I point you towards Whip of the Red Hunter, A dark fairy tale of magic, fire, blood, monsters, & Santa Claus.
Merry Christmas, all!
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