Mustache transplants on the rise


46 Responses to “Mustache transplants on the rise”

  1. dayhat says:

    Reminds me of the time I awoke in a Paris hotel room in a bath of ice, painful sutures under my nose.

  2. GawainLavers says:

    Pierre Brouhaha?  I’m calling “fake”…also, if this were real it would be happening in SF, not Turkey.

  3. Antinous / Moderator says:

    They can have mine.  I can grow enough for three other guys.

  4. Ashen Victor says:

    Now hipsters can have their ironic moustaches no matter the gender or undernasal capacity.

  5. ali says:

    His website ( seems legit. And he also does pubic hair implants. Strange world.

    • chris jimson says:

      I don’t wanna know where he gets the hair for the mustaches. 

      • cdh1971 says:

        I don’t know the specifics – haven’t looked it up (yet), but I would think that the best place would be the back of the head which is where the usual cells for standard hair transplants are obtained ’cause the hair on the back of the head is the least likely and the last hair to succumb to male pattern baldness. 

        Scalp hair of course is often different from facial hair, but I imagine this can be remedied using the usual cosmetic dyes and potions created for male facial hair. 

        Modern hair transplants do not use ‘plug’ like before – they transplant individual hair cells and groups of a few cells depending on the location. I imagine if one has ample, curly, back hair, this can be a donor site too. I am not going to speculate about other sources of short, curly, hair.  

        “A man’s past is not simply a dead history…it is still a quivering part of himself, bringing shudders and bitter flavours and the tinglings of a merited shame.”

  6. Jem Sweeney says:

    Ron Swanson hates this.

  7. spocko says:

    Turkish plastic surgeon Selahattin Tulunay says the number of mustache implants he performs has boomed in the last few years. 
    Selahattin Tulunay is Turkish for Gullible Americans. 
    Selahattin Tulunay is Turkish for April Fools
    Take your pick. Actually the doctor is real, I just went to his page
    The English Translation of his Bio:
    Dr. Tulunay Who?
    plastic surgeon to know intimately.

    Well then.

    He says he does hair transplants, Breast implants and the usual stuff but nothing on the page about mustache transplants.
    TV station was rolled.

    There is clearly some kind of hipster joke challenge going on here since they love Mustaches, maybe a promo from that unlicensed taxi company that has a mustache on the car.

    “Let’s see if we can get a TV station to run this mustache implant story as real.”
    “Nobody is that dumb.” 
    “No really, I can do it, and on an LA station, they will believe anything reguarding plastic surgery. They think everyone is as vain and dumb as them.”
    “But the media will check it out! Google!”
    “By calling Turkey? Doubtful. They don’t even confirm lies in English.”
    “Okay, If you get it on LA TV I’ll give you 1000 bucks.”
    “You’re on!”

  8. So, isn’t anyone going to ask…?

    Exactly where do they get the transplant *from*?

    • Brainspore says:

      Don’t worry, it’s all locally grown.

    • welcomeabored says:

      I was gonna… it’s hair taken from the head.  If it’s a hair transplant, they move hair from the back of the head, since balding is usually a progression from front to back. 

      Being a woman old enough to have plucked her eyebrows to the point of killing the follicles (+ age-related sparseness), I once considered an eyebrow transplant and so investigated the procedure.  The transplanted hair is inclined to do what it is programmed to do — head hair grows long.  A man would go ahead and trim his mustache regularly.  The idea of having to continually trim back my eyebrows to maintain their shape was a little too weird for me.  A little pencilling is good enough.

  9. Brainspore says:

    The procedure costs about $7,000.

    It will pay for itself after only 140,000 rides!

  10. robcat2075 says:

    An “implant” is a strange term.  Hair “implants” have typically been associated with quackery.  Transplants are possible but an implant of some foreign material, no.

  11. sburns54 says:

    I wonder if that also means that mustache rides are on the rise. 

  12. feetleet says:

    Insert pearly-gates-dispositive clitoral mutilation joke.

  13. wetitnpetit says:

    Balding upper lips on grown males in a Middle Eastern country.

    Most of the teenage women don’t have issues growing moustaches and you expect us to believe this?^ 

  14. gijoel says:

    Arthur, I can feel the mustache touching my brain.

  15. Are there any fans of Spanish cult filmmaker Jess Franco here? You might be amused to know that Dr. Orloff is alive and well, and performing cosmetic and facial reconstruction surgery in Burbank, California:

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      Please to explain? I knew George Orloff when he was a resident.

      • There’s a fictional “Dr. Orloff” created by filmmaker Jess Franco and featured in a number of his movies, starting with The Awful Dr. Orloff (1962). The character has nothing to do with the real Dr. Orloff except that they are both plastic surgeons. Fictional Dr. Orloff is also a classic cinematic “mad scientist” (often played by the great Howard Vernon), whose typical M.O. is to kidnap young women and peel off their faces to use in his surgical experiments, usually with the help of Morpho, a monster created from one his early experiments.

        Jess Franco’s fandom is small, but passionate. Finding out that there’s a real-world Dr. Orloff who does face surgeries is like finding out that there’s a real Dr. Frankenstein working on postmortem resuscitation or a real-world Rotwang working on robotics.

        Dayhat’s comment above was what started me on that train of thought.

  16. Adam Donkus says:

    Hmm, so suddenly the Family Guy episode where Peter loses his mustache in a fire and tapes Brian to his face does not seem so ludicrous. 

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