What's causing the mysterious mass animal die-offs? Buttsecks.

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Cindy Jacobs, a "respected prophet," says birds and fish may be dying off en masse because of the repeal of Don't Ask, Don't Tell. In other words: buttsecks kills.

"From Pokemon cards and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, to Marilyn Manson and psychic hotlines, this nation is under siege," she warns in her new book.

What what

(via James Urbaniak)