Photo of freaky monster terrorizing Santa Fe, Argentina

A resident of Santa Fe, Argentina snapped this photo of a horrific beast that allegedly is killing dogs in the town. It's said to be 7-feet-tall and resemble a cross between a horse and El Chupacabra. YouTube channel UFOmania reported on the creature so perhaps the most reasonable explanation is that it's an evil extraterrestrial that hates doggos.

(iHeartRadio via Fark) Read the rest

Man donates frostbitten digits to Canadian bar to use as a cocktail garnish

British Adventurer Nick Griffiths sustained severe frostbite in three of his toes while mucking about in the Canadian Yukon a couple of months ago. He'd been competing in the Yukon Arctic Ultra race when exposure to the damp, extreme cold of Canada's far north did to him what it does. Despite the time he'd taken to convalesce from his injuries, Griffiths was told by doctors in England that they would have to amputate three of his toes to stave off infection. Griffiths asked to keep his dismembered digits and his surgeons were happy to comply. They gave Griffiths his three detached little piggies, preserved in liquid-filled bottles. 

The question of what to do with the toes was an easy one for Griffiths to answer. According to the CBC, the adventurer has offered to donate them to Dawson City's Sourdough Saloon to be served up in cocktails for punters with a taste for human feet.

As any Canadian will tell you (I'm pretty sure they include the fact on our citizenship test), the Downtown Hotel serves up a unique cocktail: The Sourtoe. The ingredients of a Sourtoe Cocktail are simple, but kind of hard to come by: a shot of whisky and a severed human toe. Once the drink has been downed, it's tradition that the toe be returned to the Sourdough Saloon's bartender to be reused. But that doesn't always happen. People have run off with one of the toes in the past and, in 2013, some tool decided to swallow it along with his booze. Read the rest

Watch "Dog Police," a bizarre DEVO-inspired music video from 1984

Inspired by DEVO, Memphis musicians Tony Thomas, Sam Shoup, and Tom Lonardo took a break from the weirdo jazz fusion jams of their "real" trio create Dog Police. Dig the lyrics:

The boys in blue had my baby on the floor, They were asking her if she wanted some more. They pulled out a net, they pulled out a leash, They said they were the... Dog Police!

The resulting video was a big hit on MTV's "Basement Tapes" DIY music video contest and later on Night Flight:

In the spring of 1990, the video’s popularity also led to the creation of a TV sitcom pilot called “Dog Police,” about a trio of psychic doggy detectives from outer space who wear fedoras and beige trenchcoats and grumble their dialogue to each other like they’re all channeling Humphrey Bogart.

Comic actor Adam Sandler made a cameo appearance in the pilot (which possibly was never aired more than once), and the show was to also prominently feature Jeremy Piven as a beat cop. (Clip below.)

More at Night Flight (via r/ObscureMedia, thanks UPSO!)

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Watch this bizarre Komputer Tutor supercut of the phrase "floppy diskette"

An absurd and wonderful example of semantic satiation, starring the "Komputer Tutor" Kim Komando, best known for her bestselling 1990s instructional videos sold via infomericial. And in case you were wondering, Kim Komando is still at it!

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Freaky orange snow falls on parts of Eastern Europe

Pats of Russia, Bulgaria, Ukraine, Romania, and Moldova was covered with orange snow this weekend. The odd hue was caused by sand blown into the atmosphere from the Sahara Desert that mixed with snow and rain. The same Saharan dust also resulted in a very orange tint to the Greek island of Crete, seen below.

"African Dust Turns Snow Orange in Eastern Europe" (Weather.com)

Второй день после выпадения загадочных осадков. Самочувствие хорошее, аномалий не обнаружено, третья рука не выросла. Полагаю версии о токсичных отходах/цементе/или чего-то там ещё, о чем холят слухи в интернетах, можно отсечь. Самый что ни на есть настоящий песок⛰ #sandboarding #nofilter #moodygrams #justgoshoot #aov #artofvisual #artofvisuals #heatercentral #agameoftones #fatalframes #hypebeast #pic #citysquad #gameoftones #createexplore #all_shoots #madrussians #rosakhutor #gorkygorod #krasnayapolyana #горкигород #розахутор #вотэтода #snow #mothernature #naturelover #goodvibes. #инструкторкраснаяполяна #инструкторсноуборд #инструкторпосноуборду

A post shared by Алексей Козин (@slivi4) on Mar 24, 2018 at 4:23am PDT

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Flight crew member smuggles 9 pounds of cocaine worth $160K in his pants

A Fly Jamaica Airline crew member tried to smuggle $160K worth of cocaine in his pants, from Montego Bay into John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York. His ingenious transport method for the nearly nine pounds of cocaine failed to trick agents for the U.S. Customs and Border Protection.

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Huge air bubble discovered in otherwise healthy dude's head

Brains are so overrated. Sure, they let us know when it's time to poop and help us to find our car keys, but that's not very impressive for an organ that takes up just about all of the space in a skull. You could totally get away with a smaller brain just fine. Check it out: according to The Washington Post, a seemingly healthy fella was found to have a 3.5" air bubble in his skull where a good chunk of his grey matter should be and he was still walking around, eating sandwiches and everything.

The 84-year-old gentleman's missing brains were discovered after he complained of taking frequent falls and a loss of sensation on one side of his body – symptoms commonly associated with a stroke. When he reported to the emergency room to get checked out, the ER doctors were gobsmacked to discover that their patient had a massive, pressurized air bubble – called a pneumatocoele – in his skull where brains should have been.

The empty head space was particularly surprising because the man arrived in the emergency department with afflictions otherwise common for his age. He had been complaining to his regular doctor about repeated falls and feeling unsteady in recent months. When the man added left-sided arm and leg weakness to the list of complaints, his doctor advised him to go to the emergency room, fearing a possible stroke.

But aside from the weakness and unsteadiness, the man was in good shape. In the case report, doctors noted that “there was no confusion, facial weakness, visual or speech disturbance… He was otherwise fit and well, independent with physical activities of daily living (PADLs) and lived at home with his wife and two sons.

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Jeff Goldblum Jeff Goldblums a special Jeff Goldblum meal for you

Jeff Goldblum admits that he can't cook. But that won't keep Jeff Goldblum from cooking. In this video Jeff Goldblum Jeff Goldblums the shit out of a pot of soup. Product plugs abound, but hey: Jeff Goldblum.

It's not as good as Cooking with Chrisopher Walken, but I'll take it. Read the rest

What to do in an emergency

Hey, at least now you know. Buy yourself a coke to celebrate:

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Video feedback + coughing = ultimate example of re-encoding quality degradation

Jack Douglass is his name, and he has a cough.

"You found my YouTube channel where I like to make fun of everything because I'm too scared to confront reality. Enjoy your stay!
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What happens when a neural network proposes legislation?

In her delightful blog AI Weirdness, Janelle Shane entered 18,458 unique bills introduced in Massachusetts into a neural network, which then created some rather hilarious bills, including: Read the rest

Fergie's rendition of Star-Spangled Banner legendary by dawn

At last night's NBA All-Star basketball game, singer Fergie sang the Star-Spangled banner for thousands at the venue and millions at home. She's been getting interesting reviews and people stayed up late to give them. I, for one, hope she now sings Happy Birthday to President Trump, concluding by shouting "Let's play some basketball" Read the rest

The Onion's review of Fifty Shades Freed

Peter K. Rosenthal faces an existential crisis after watching 'Fifty Shades Freed' and learning the nature of his predicament.

For as long as I remember I've been imprisoned here, forced to watch an endless cavalcade of rote, insipid moviemaking. ... Every DVD I watch is slipped in on a tray. Recently, for some reason, they've also been putting this revolver on it.

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Glenn Payette, CBC News, St. Jooooooooooooooohns

Glenn Payette is a TV news reporter for CBC in Newfoundland and Labrador. Over the years, his pronunciation of the name of the province's capital has undergone an amazing transformation.

Previously: Gustavo Almadovar Read the rest

The Simpsons' classic "steamed hams" gag gets the deep meme treatment

The season 7 gem starring Principal Skinner and Superintendant Chalmers has seen a massive uptick in meme activity in late 2017. Here are some highlights: Read the rest

SNL writer spies on and 'fart-shames' his friend remotely using a Nest cam

As a safety measure, SNL writer Nick Kocher recently installed a Nest cam in his apartment.

He then left town for the weekend, letting his friend Jon Bass crash at his place.

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Disturbing animation of rubbery, squidgy SCI heads

"Parasitic endeavours" is a short NSFW animation by Simon Christoph Krenn, with sound design by Matthias Urban, an entry in the emergent genre of ultra-realistic CGI human bodies behaving like unusual materials. [via Sploid] Read the rest

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