Krull: the movie... and the wedding


43 Responses to “Krull: the movie... and the wedding”

  1. Anonymous says:

    I highly recommend watching Krull on mute with the super slow Bieber playing instead. That was a captivating twenty minutes.

  2. Jonathan Badger says:

    I think Krull was quite enjoyable — and yes, I did see it as a child in the theatre, but a couple of years ago I netflixed it and found it quite watchable (unlike many movies I had fond memories of but which didn’t hold up to adult viewing).

    Okay, so it *is* derivative, but that’s part of its charm. It doesn’t know what it wants to be — Star Wars, The (original) Clash of the Titans, generic D&D fantasy — so it steals shamelessly from all of these.

    But, yes, it is very weird that people would want to get married in a Krull themed wedding (or in a group wedding at all — a bit too Moonie-ish)

  3. mccrum says:

    This may be the only form of wedding that Trekkie weddings look down upon.

  4. Ronald Pottol says:

    Worst movie I’ve ever paid to see. We walked out on it.

  5. muteboy says:

    I still watch Krull if it’s on. Good bunch of British actors. Liam “Pork Dim Sum” Neeson, Bernard “Carry On Camping” Bresslaw, Todd “Tucker Jenkins off of Grange Hill” Carty, Freddie “LIFE! Is full of surprises!” Jones, Lysette “Om Nom Nom” Anthony, Francesca “Bene Gesserit” Annis, Alun “pretty much everything ever” Armstrong, and the sadly missed David Battley as Ergo the magnificent (“short in stature, tall in power, narrow of purpose and wide of vision”)

  6. kuanes says:

    Actually saw this in at Drive-In theater when I was a kid.

    Yes, “Krull” is somewhat cheesy in retrospect, but I thought (and continue to do so) it was the coolest.


    Great cheesy movie. I saw it in the theater and I nearly shit my pants when they kill one of the bad guys and ooze slips out his broken helmet.

    “They look like humans but they are not! Holly Virgin! Shit!”

  8. tim says:

    The only good thing about Krull was watching Lysette Anthony. And that only just made up for the rest of it.

  9. walkranrunning says:

    I’ve got to wonder: how did their participation in this themed wedding affect their wedding success? More divorces or fewer? And were their teenage kids more or less likely to die of embarrassment when Mom and Dad, after a couple of merlots, would again pull out the romantic old story of cutting the wedding cake with that shuriken-like glaive?

    The truth must be out there. Statistics, anyone?

  10. Anonymous says:

    ohh I loved Krull as a kid!! My brothers and sisters used to throw ninja stars at each other and yell “Krull!” Thanks for the rewind.

  11. Anonymous says:

    “Krull” was as cheesy as it could get (with the exception of some nice costume designs & sets…), but it sure was entertaining, to say the least! I agree “Beastmaster” sucked (but it still has it’s quaint charm…), but “Conan” was great. It had a lot of great scenes (example: when Arnold rolls the giant pot over and ‘crashes’ the orgy…), and without a doubt had the baddest, beefiest, hardest, drum-pounding barbarian theme ever! Plus it was rated-R and didn’t hold back on sword play violence! Lol!

  12. bobhughes says:

    what a great arcade game it was. everything else about it, beh..

  13. Snig says:

    Also interesting that society didn’t flinch with a group Krull wedding, but elements have a hissy fit with gay marriage.

  14. rjmiller says:

    Quick contest: Name an epic fantasy film that is better than Krull, made pre-2000, and isn’t LotR.

    Sure, Krull is pretty bad, but it’s still awesome. At least it isn’t Hawk the Slayer.

    • Pantograph says:


      • rjmiller says:

        You win. Willow rocks.

        But let’s be honest about Beastmaster and Conan the Barbarian: they kinda sucked. Bad acting, slow plotting, poor writing. The best scene in Conan is probably when Arnold punches out a camel (in fact, they recognize this and call back to it in Conan the Destroyer).

        Krull had some inventive stuff at least, like the black widow scene. You also had comic relief magician David Battley (of Rutland fame), who was probably the best thing in the film. The villain is pretty pathetic though, it’s hard to match up to James Earl Jones.

    • Snig says:

      Ralph Bakshi’s Wizards. Or so would have said adolescent Snig. Also Highlander.

    • Anonymous says:

      BEASTMASTER owns krull.

    • Teller says:

      Conan el Barbarian.

    • knoxblox says:

      Crow was the coolest elf EVAR!

    • Anonymous says:

      Beastmaster, oh yeah!

    • Brainspore says:

      Star Wars.

    • abulaf1a says:

      Easy: Ladyhawke.

      Awesome cast, good acting (although Broderick’s accent comes and goes), and occasionally lovely art direction. A good movie only let down by a god-awful ’80s synth score.

      For the record, I still like Krull for the cheese factor (and Lysette Anthony *sigh*), and I think the interior set design for the Beast’s castle/ship/big rock holds up well even now.

    • bobhughes says:

      The Princess Bride? and I see someone had just beaten me to Ladyhawke

  15. Hassenfeffer says:

    I worked for the bridal manufacturer that made the dress for the movie! LOL!

  16. Anonymous says:

    “Our dream is to get married in a way that makes a joke out of this important milestone in our lives. We hope to give birth to our first child while dressed up as cereal mascots for a Kellogs promotion.”

  17. Lydia9 says:

    Wow. We got our first VCR back in 1984, and Krull was one of the five kid-appropriate videos we owned (TV movie “Arthur The King”, Beastmaster, Pirates of Penzance, and West Side Story rounded out the collection, so yup, musical-themed episodes of sci-fi/fantasy shows float my boat to a scary degree). I was ten, so I didn’t realize how bad this movie was, but I was JUST savvy enough to grasp that the love plot, wedding vows, and treatment of women in general were by far the most disturbing aspects of the movie. Liam Neeson, however, was fabulous as the psychic cyclops. Nothing but awesome as far as he’s concerned.

    That said in more recent history, Las Vegas’ Star Trek Experience offered wedding packages, and it seems that the Disney wedding packages are also wildly popular. Krull lacks the advantage of being as firmly ensconced in the zeitgeist as Star Trek and Disney, but looking at this from the age of reality shows, it does seem to be a pretty apt predictor of the weird choices people will make in order to get their faces in the media.

    • David Pescovitz says:

      If you read the full article, he addresses the Star Trek and Star Wars wedding scene. As I said, the thing that made the Krull example particularly odd is that these people tried (and succeeded) to tie a very important moment in their life to a movie that they hadn’t even seen.

    • Anonymous says:

      Wasn’t Liam Neeson playing the roll of Kegan?
      Bernard Bresslaw was Rell the Cyclops.

    • toolbag says:

      Actually Neeson wasn’t the Cyclops, he was the guy with the axe that shot lasers. One of my favorite movies as a child, next to Road Warrior.

      • Zadaz says:

        “Actually Neeson wasn’t the Cyclops, he was the guy with the axe that shot lasers.”

        How can any movie that this quote applies to not be awesome?

        • noah django says:

          exactly. I lol’d

          I loved this movie when I saw it as a kid, same with Beastmaster.

          speaking of, I came across Beastmaster on Telefutura the other day and didn’t change channels ’til it was over, despite the fact I speak almost no spanish. I wish it had been Krull. And now I’ve netflixed it, it is loading as I post this. suck it, haters.

  18. MrsBug says:

    I remember seeing Krull in the theater. Can’t remember if I liked it or not (I probably did – I have no taste).

    • headcode says:

      I most definitely remember seeing this in the theater. I was with my college work friends and we could not believe how bad it was.

  19. eyebum says:

    Oh wow, Krull sucked.

    Man, I loved Krull.

  20. Anonymous says:

    Dragonslayer was better than Krull. Hell, The Last Starfighter was better than Krull. The only good part about Krull was the silly weapon, which defied all laws of common sense in weapon design but managed to look cool.

  21. Anonymous says:

    We used to joke that HBO stood for “Hey, Beastmaster’s On!”

    Seriously, they must have played that movie ten bazillion times.

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      We used to joke that HBO stood for “Hey, Beastmaster’s On!” Seriously, they must have played that movie ten bazillion times.

      That was the core of David Letterman’s opening monologue for several years.

    • Gyrofrog says:

      Yeah, I remember out of all the weeks in the school year, I happened to be sick THAT WEEK.

  22. cisco says:

    Beastmaster, kid-appropriate?

    I saw it when I was 10 or so, but I recall it being a little “adult” in spots. OK, I’ll admit that I’ve watched it at least once more since then. ;-)

    And for the record, I remember liking Krull. And be honest, how many of you went home and immediately went about fabricating a large throwing “star” with razor blades at the tips and then immediately cutting yourself? Nobody? Really?

  23. Anonymous says:

    Flesh+Blood – directed by Paul Verhoeven, starring Rutger Hauer and (occasionally very naked) Jennifer Jason Leigh. Better than Ladyhawke!

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