By Cory Doctorow at 6:14 am Fri, Apr 6, 2012
An unnamed brand of smoke grenade includes "Don't be a dick with our products" in its instructions. Apparently this is Canadian (judging from the bilingual instructions).
Smoke grenade instructions.. (imgur.com) (via Lowering the Bar)
You know, it looks like they didn’t translate that bit into French.
Obviously, it means that bit of advice doesn’t apply to French speakers.
Yup, we have a constitutional right to be dicks. See our president, for instance.
Not this president, the one a couple back. And don’ say W had one…he had to have the VP carry it for him.
This so much better than say, ‘not to be taken orally’ or some other incredibly obvious bit of pointless idiocy…
Do not post?
Too late. It ignited the second Cory posted this.
What a dick!
Don’t send it through the mail
Always a good policy!
Yeah, what does DO NOT POST mean? Don’t video the results of using this smoke grenade and post it to social media?
maybe it means Do Not Enhance The Effects Of This Smoke Grenade With CGI In Post-Production Of Your Video.
“Do not post” = “Don’t mail, jackass.”
Clearly photoshopped — there’s no gap between the French and English on the left and there is on the right. The gap on the left has been filled with the joke text.
ding ding ding… we have a winner.
Why? Surely formatting depends on how much room they had for the text of the first column?
No. Why would someone bother to do a glare/focus gradient on such a silly joke? Notice that the text is clearer as you move to the right.
Not a shop.
I’d really like to see the same warning on a vibrator.
Hint: Post Office.
I would have been really curious to see the translation of “Don’t be a dick” in French. Slang insults are always tricky to translate. Maybe « Ne faites pas le con? »
The French text is ‘CF’ not ‘FR’. So that’d be « Fais pas le niaiseux, câlisse! »
Pensée pour Jessica Paré et son magnifique câlisse dans Mad Men. ;)
“Zou bisou bisou!”
You’re wondering what I’m wondering. I could ask a French friend of mine, but I don’t she’s like that.
I really really want to see what the product-maker translated it as.
I had no idea Wil Wheaton had broken out of media into incendiary devices…
I’m having a little trouble thinking of non-dick uses for a smoke bomb.
Agree. Unless you’re on a SWAT team what do you need a smoke grenade for?
We use them all the time for our firefighter training. They aren’t really grenades in the “pull-the-ring-out-and-go-boom” sense. In fact, they don’t explode at all, but just generate a lot of dense black smoke for about 5 minutes. There are machines that do the same thing with an aerosol can of fuel, but they’re expensive and can be fussy to use. The grenades are way cheaper and easier to use, even with bulky firefighter’s gloves on.
Its used in Paintball
In the US it’s a violation of Federal law to use that product in a manner inconsistent with it’s labeling.
Canadian? Or in French for ex-colonial state’s cops/military to easily understand?
I have a story! And it relates to a french smoke grenade too!
There was a bar where a bunch of workerd had left a box with a label marked “Property of [their group] – Don’t open”, which was OK since people often left extra bags of peanuts or somesuch with their name on it. But they came only about once a week, so after a while people got curious. Finally someone opened the box and triggered the rigged smoke grenade inside, the kind that also makes a big cloud of bright yellow dust… It was in a bar in Antarctica.
sounds like the pranksters were using that smoke grenade in a manner inconsistent with it’s labeling (see: “dick” clause.)
They should adopt this label on pepper spray in the US.
canada Funny Gadgets reddit weapons wheaton's law
Submit a tip
The rules you agree to by using this website.
Who will be eaten first?
Jason Weisberger, Publisher
Ken Snider, Sysadmin