Fake vaginas sold as powerful Chinese medicinal mushrooms

While doing some construction work, residents of the Liucunbu village in China's Shaanxi province came across a fake vagina that they, um, mistakenly identified as a lingzhi mushroom, legendary in Chinese medicine for its reportedy super-powerful healing and anti-aging properties. It's not clear whether the villagers really thought the sex toy was a mushroom or not, but in any case they called in an Xi'an TV news reporter who bought into the magic mushroom story. She produced a story about the discovery that actually aired. You can view that here. The following day, the TV program apologized for their error, claiming that "(the) reporter was still very young and unwise to the ways of the world." But that wasn't the end of this terrific tale. Now, a street vendor is selling artificial vaginas as the mushrooms for as much as US$2,800. As you can see from the above news report, he's even playing the original Xi'an TV news piece at his stall. When questioned by one Doubting Thomas, the vendor simply said, "It's on the news. How can it be fake?"

"ZOMG! Enterprising street seller now passing off artificial vajayjays as taisui mushrooms!" (Shanghaiist)

""Mystery mushroom" which leaves Xi'an villagers befuddled turns out to be artificial vajayjay" (Shanghaiist)

David Pescovitz is Boing Boing's co-editor/managing partner. He's also a research director at Institute for the Future. On Instagram, he's @pesco.

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bcsizemo

What exactly does the legend say to do with this mushroom? Cause unless your are suppose to have sex with it I’d think you’d figure out it wasn’t organic when you started cutting it.
fnc

“Note : Mushrooms are for novelty use only.”
Mitchell Glaser

Never buy mushrooms from a novelty store. So chewy.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=557683737 Adam Greenfield

I wonder how sick you would get if you actually tried to cook and eat one of these.
- SomeGuyNamedMark
  
  You think they’d notice something was amiss when they were trying to hack their way through something with the texture of hard rubber vs every other mushroom they’ve ever eaten.
  - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=557683737 Adam Greenfield
    
    You think they’d notice it looks like a vagina too…
    - http://profiles.google.com/joshuabardwell Joshua Bardwell
      
      To be fair, lots of plants and fungi look like penises and vaginas.
    - SomeGuyNamedMark
      
      I think they failed that step when they bought it
http://evilbobdayjob.blogspot.com/ Deidzoeb

I’m frightened about the idea of some people taking this story in the opposite direction: finding big mushrooms, heating them for a few seconds in the microwave, cutting a hole . . .
- bloopeeriod
  
  I was afraid too until I found a particularly handsome specimen. I called him Gus. Turns out he was fun.
SomeGuyNamedMark

I just glanced at the article. So they have vaginas growing out of the ground in China? I’m changing my vacation plans.
jerwin

I wonder if a dildo would work just as well as rhino horn/human horn.
- Moriarty
  
  I think it would work exactly as well.
- KWillets
  
  I’m worried they’ll start going after the real thing.
  - SomeGuyNamedMark
    
    So replace rhino horns with dildos is what you’re saying?
Editz

So Xi’an TV reporters can just broadcast anything all by themselves without supervisory review? Pretty neat business model!
- malindrome
  
  The rule is simple: don’t mention any of the “Three Ts and an F” (Tibet, Taiwan, Tiananmen + Falun Gong). Otherwise, it’s all good.
P Hirlehey

This is a viral ad for the next American Pie movie.
Quiche de Resistance

“1 up”, indeed.
Kibo

Is it possible that this is just a way for people to buy sex toys discreetly? (How difficult is it normally to buy them in China?)

After all, in the US, selling quasi-legal things discreetly by officially mis-representing their purpose is common — “bath salts” that are really synthetic drugs, “video head cleaner” that’s really poppers, tiny fake roses that are really crack pipes (you throw away the rose and keep the glass tube), etc.

…to say nothing of “massage” businesses that are really prostitution…
- http://www.disoriented.net/ angusm
  
  Do people need to buy sex toys in China? I hear they grow wild, and you can just dig ‘em up.
  
  I saw it on the TV, so it must be true.
- jahxman
  
  I don’t think the Chinese are really that prudish about sex as to make sex toys quasi-legal – and any way what a markup! US$2,800 for a fake vajayjay!
  
  Pretty sure you could rent a real one for a lot less in most places in China, if you wanted to.
  - ocker3
    
    Perhaps the vendor knows they’re only likely to find a few rubes to purchase these and need to get in and out quick before they get arrested
- Mitchell Glaser
  
  For years I wondered about the little roses in a glass tube that they sell at 7-11. I happened to mention it to a friend while we were there one day, and he told me that they were crack pipes! Then his burrito, which he had neglected to unwrap, exploded in the microwave and we made a hasty exit.
Sigmund_Jung

On the other hand, that Chinese fake vagina I bought tasted great with butter.
http://twitter.com/MrAaronSwainEsq Aaron Swain

The word “vajayjay” should be banned from the English language and its users should be buried alive.
Øyvind

So many jokes about “pussy power”. But i’ll dismiss those, and instead try to see the positive in the situation. If the Chinese now are turning to sex toys for magical effect, maybe that’ll finally have an impact on poaching on tigers and rhinos.
jerwin

This seems relevant Dai Mahou Tenge: Wild Mushrooms

(Does this count as the Unicorn Chaser?)
http://glitch.tl/ Michael Smith

But do fake vaginas have anti-aging properties?
- petsounds
  
  Well, based on precedent they could have mercury in them, so depending on which Chinese emperor you talk to, you might have a shot at an immortal vagina.
http://twitter.com/fyer fyer

Oh they mistook it for Taishui / 太岁(http://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E8%82%89%E7%81%B5%E8%8A%9D ), not Lingzhi /灵芝(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lingzhi_mushroom ).
http://twitter.com/chrisjimson chris jimson

I find it hard to believe this guy, or anyone who actually touches them, does not realize they are made of man made rubber/silicone/whatever– you’re not gonna slice them up and toss them in a frying pan. Hence I suspect this guy is well aware they are not mushrooms, and is trying to scam people, hence the absurd price tag (you only have to sell one to make a huge profit.)