Scouts stone rabid beaver


48 Responses to “Scouts stone rabid beaver”

  1. AwesomeRobot says:

    Thank God the kids were all straight, otherwise they may have tried to nurse the beaver back to health so they could marry it.

  2. jaypee says:

    Not included in the article: The part where the band of scouts eventually turns on one of their own, nicknamed “Piggy”, and subjects him to the same fate.

  3. bradalmanac says:

    Best out-of-context sentence of the article: ““then it started attacking the noodle.”

    Close second: “Who’d be crazy enough to hang onto a rabid beaver?”

  4. Tribune says:

    How do they know the Beaver was rabid? The Poughkeepsie Journal wants me to subscribe before I can read about this momentous event.

  5. Can we kindly not confuse kids with the often ignored policies of the parent organization. Boy Scouts of America is an unkind organization. That doesn’t mean that the kids are.

    This sounds like a crappy situation that most people wouldn’t know how to handle. 

  6. flappy says:

    I thought this kind of thing only happened in Iraq.

  7. bocomo says:

    It was just a gay beaver

  8. angusm says:

    All the kids were subsequently awarded a “Stoning Rabid Beaver” merit badge.

  9. hakuin says:

    I hope this doesn’t lead to  lead to more beaver massacre by idiots concluding that every animal defending its turf is rabid. 

  10. bwohlgemuth says:

    Did the beaver say Jehovah?

  11. cbbb says:

    Ouch, TFA blocked by paywall.

  12. SedanChair says:

    I told you about that sharia bro


  13. bjacques says:

    Hmm, attacks by badgers, by weasels and baboons, but no beavers.


  14. Ramone says:

    So this proves once and for all that scouts will do anything to avoid a beaver.

  15. efergus3 says:

    Hey, everyone – shots all around!

  16. Mike says:

    Here in Colorado there’s been problems with rabid skunks.     No one is saying how to tell if a skunk is rabid…

    • Cowicide says:

      I’ve been warning people for years that beavers are serious foes to humanity.  I’ve been threatened twice by beavers and that’s enough for me.

  17. Ronald Pottol says:

    This sounds like the boy scouts I remember!

  18. Nicole Isaac says:

    Dabnabit! It was Daggett Doofus Beaver method acting.

  19. Boundegar says:

    Thus the scouts upheld the commandment of Neuteronomy 14:10: “If a beaver biteth thy master, it is an abomination.  Thou shalt kill it with stones, sayeth the LORD.”

  20. Lurking_Grue says:


  21. jbond says:

    Was it afraid of water?

  22. Antinous / Moderator says:

    I thought that scouts were supposed to be prepared.  Didn’t anyone pack a beaver cleaver?

    • penguinchris says:

      I tried thinking of a joke about The Beaver (Cleaver) getting packed in a suitcase, but my mind took it to Eddie Haskell packing The Beaver to bring to the Jamboree where Haskell’s fellow scouts (who I presume are similarly slimy assholes) proceed to pack The Beaver, if you know what I mean. Heh, “slimy assholes”. 

  23. Im really not sure weather or not i should be outraged because of some tenuous animal cruelty loyalty.
    Thanks for the early morning ethical dilemma David

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