Just look at this shattered banana that gives mute testimony of the bitter cold of Norway.

Just look at it.

This is how cold it is in Norway right now. (i.imgur.com) (Thanks, arbitrary aardvark!)


  1. As an atheist and a tree-hugging liberal,  this is MY WORST NIGHTMARE.
    It disproves evolution and global warming in one fell swoop.

  2. How do I put this? Cory – You have been exhibiting an unusual interest in bananas lately. Are you trying to tell us (or perhaps yourself) something?

  3. When Mr. Wizard dunked a banana in liquid nitrogen and then shattered it with a hammer I thought, “That’s so cool. Where can I get some liquid nitrogen?”

    Now I realize I don’t need any. I just need to catch the next flight to Norway. And I’ll visit the home of Knut Hamsun while I’m there!

  4. “My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana. I said no, but I want a regular banana later, so yeah.”
    -Mitch Hedberg

    1. Because one good Mitch Hedberg quote deserves another:

      “With a stop light, green means ‘go’ and yellow means ‘slow down’. With a banana, however, it is quite the opposite. Yellow means ‘go’, green means ‘whoa, slow down’, and red means ‘where the heck did you get that banana?'”

        1. I know! I should have admitted that that particular joke drives me nuts because I’ve had red bananas. Although they’re usually not easy to find in my area, so, depending on where you live, “Where the heck did you get that banana?” still makes sense.

          1.  True – I don’t think I’ve ever had the opportunity to buy one, so it’s still the obvious thing to ask. :D

  5. this is weird. i too live in norway, and i have noticed unusually many frozen bananas just lying idly around my neighbourhood. something must be up.

      1.  not a single ape (or many animals at all; it’s been an animal-unfriendly -15C lately). Plenty pensioners, though.

  6. Icewinds Tears Drip On My My Unbeloved Peel

    Coven Of Black Mist Sing For Me

    Ceremonial Hymns Of The Purest Blasphemy

    At One With The Earth

    Alone With Light In My Eyes

    The Ravens Circle Around My Tomb

    As I Dream The Night

    Frozen By Icewinds


    It is the coldest day of the year. A PEASANT stands by the side of the road, slowly and deliberately eating a banana. His repast complete, he drops the PEEL beside the road and rides off on his bicycle.

    A hooded figure approaches from the distance. It is DEATH. The PEASANT speeds further and further away on his bicycle, but DEATH does not quicken his pace. DEATH is patient. The PEASANT must stop sometime.

    DEATH’s stride is long, but his steps are measured.

    The banana PEEL waits. Ice crystals form along its edges, and hoar frost slowly envelopes it.

    The PEASANT reaches his humble cottage. He stokes the fire in his stove and stops to warm his hands.

    The wind howls while the PEEL lies motionless, as still and fragile as glass.

    DEATH lets out a snort, shrouding his features in fog. One measured pace after another —

    Suddenly, there is a sound like a snapping twig, like breaking glass, like the crack of a rifle from across the forest.

    But there will be no pratfall today. It is too cold even for that, and the PEASANT is waiting.

  8. I just wanted to say that it’s way the fuck colder in Montreal right now than in Norway (Olso, at least). Cold enough that your eyes water and then your eyelashes freeze together. 

  9. That’s my heart lying in the gutter there; a heart like a shattered banana.

    That’s my banana lying in the gutter there; a banana like a shattered heart.

    Take your pick; that’s what life’s all about.

  10. Don’t remind me of how fucking cold it is in NYC today.  I actually got windburn on my face–as in face was tender/raw when I went to wash off my makeup tonite–and it’s a first for me.  This is after going to school in Upstate NY.  

    1. Some parts of upstate NY state have a reputation for cold and snow, but NYC definitely gets colder (and much windier because of the buildings, a very important factor). 

      I am from Buffalo, famous for snow, and went to school in Rochester. I *have* gotten plenty of windburn of the face etc. in those places, but I suppose that engaging in winter shenanigans as a youth (not to mention skiing) is different from going to school and only leaving your dorm in winter when it’s absolutely necessary ;)

      NYC in winter kicks my ass every time, and I never seem to learn my lesson.

  11. this shattered frozen banana peel reflects all that is in my heart. torn and shattered. asunder. frozen. desolate. that is my heart. just look at it.

  12. Yesterday was the coldest day Chicago has seen in two years. It was also the day that the heat went out in my apartment.

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