Ordering food at Taco Bell drive-thru while watching a parking lot fight

A man calmly orders a meal at Taco Bell while recording two women sharply disagreeing about something in the parking lot. And now, here come the first responders to break it.

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  1. Those poor firemen don't know what to do.

    "Should... should we get the hose? Usually when we have problems we get the hose."

    "I am not sure if the hose is what we need here."

    "But, the hose. It's all we know. Oooh, or the ax!"

    "No, Jerry. Not the ax. Axes are for doors and structures."

    "So... the hose then?"

  2. There used to be a Polish restaurant not far from me that wasn't in a terrific part of town. The cook and server was one guy named Teddy; he'd come out, take your order, make your food, and serve it in big tureens. True home cooking, really lovely guy with two cauliflower ears and a big red nose.

    One time my friends and I were there (the only customers, it wasn't a busy place) when the door opened and this wirey bearded guy in a track suit poked his head in and yelled a question in Polish to Teddy. Teddy answered back and the guy walked in and kept talking in Polish. Teddy put his arm around him, smiled, and gently walked him back out. "This place was once bar. He is local drunk, comes around, wants beer," he shrugged. The guy stuck his head back in and shouted something angrily in Polish. Teddy reached around the counter, grabbed a baseball bat, and ran after him out the door.

    Ten minutes went buy. Things got awkward. Then Teddy came back inside, all sweaty, and grinned at us, shaking his baseball bat. "Ha! No charge for dinner show with baseball bat!! I cook galubkis and bigos now!"

  3. Fourth fireman walks onto the scene:

    Fireman #4: [looks at two women fighting, then at Fireman #1] What's going on here?
    Fireman #1: It's—I don't know, I just found them fighting only thirty seconds ago.
    Fireman #4: Well, where the hell's the hose?
    Fireman #1: [looks at Fireman #2]

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