Surviving Edged Weapons, fabulous police training video from the VHS 'n' Crack era

"Of course, you're aware of the balisong," intones the deep-voiced narrator, "… or butterfly knife."

Awesome, terrifying, paranoid and goofy, Surviving Edged Weapons is a relic of another era, an age of fishhook earrings and razor blade-impregnated ballcaps, where reality itself stars Charles Bronson. Which, of course, it did.

Watch the abridged version above until at least 2:20m in.

The feature-length version, the second-best VHS-era martial arts movie you ever saw, is embedded below.

From the beginning, man has possessed the attributes of the animal. Speed, power, dynamic movement. The instinct to exploit the weakness of his prey. And from his human inventiveness came weapons that could puncture and slash his enemies' flesh.

If you just want to hear the moral of the story, the following embed sums it up in a few seconds.